Lost

I have this problem, i have let my "deployment goals" get away from me, i don't know how it happened... probably because i was trying to keep my head above water... before he left i had this list. of everything that would be accomplished by the time he came back home to me. but here we are, time is passing... and i'm still the same girl, not the new and improved Sav... maybe i set my hopes too high. I mean when he was at bootcamp i did EVERYTHING plus more... but then again i had Kat to motivate my butt into gear. i had no choice but to accomplish something. we pushed each other every single day. and we got everything that we needed done. the last few weeks i've been slacking because i've been really sick... but i really wanted to "start over" today... for a few reasons.... The one i AM able to share is well it's a monday... a special monday, and i finished my antibiotics yesterday, so i assumed i would be feeling well enough to start... however i am unsure of that now. i wanted to get up at 6 this morning and do "insanity" but it's now 8:30, i've been awake for 15 minutes... and i definitely feel the phlegm in my throat... but i am SO determine to be HOT when Riley gets home..... ok i think by blogging about this, i've given myself a small burst of moto... i am going to try and find my sports bra, and whip out some insanity this morning.... it'll be worth it right?! i still have ___ more weeks left to get HOT! i can totally do that.... right?