Oh Say Can You See!

for those of you that are friends with me on facebook, you may have seen my status this afternoon about our National Anthem... i honestly think it is one of the most gorgeous songs ever. i've been to numerous events with Riley(dirt biking, car races) and 9 times out of 10, whoever is singing... BUTCHERS the song. it IS an extremely difficult song to sing, but those who CAN sing it, can give me chills (and if they are really good, make my eyes water). Having my husband join the military was not something we were planning on when we were 16, laying in the grass talking about our futures. Heck, it wasn't something we were planning on when i was 20 and we were laying in the grass talking about our future. it's funny how things play out. I've always LOVED this song, i had the priveledge of singing it twice now, (once with a group of about 6 when i was still living in washington.. and i'm sure i sounded like a chipmunk, and the 2nd time was with my long time best friend Lauren, at our schools basketball game) i'd like to think i didn't butcher it for people... except for the first time, but i was like 9 and thats to be expected :) but i was NO WHERE near the point of giving anyone the chills. haha, usually about once every 6-9 months... i get re-addicted to this song, and listen to like a BILLION renditions on youtube. today friends, was one of those days. so for your listening pleasure, here is my pick of the day. :)


GLEE! i LOOOVE this version! she is insanely talented!!!

i'm so thankful for our country, and for all the Brave people who defend it... including that amazing man i married, many years before the military was a real option for him and us. We have it SOOOOO Good because of guys like him who are willing to lay down their own life, if it comes to that, and for what? purely for the love of their country, even if they don't agree with past or current leaders, they stand for the ideal of America... They hold on with the Faith that our country is worth it, that our cause is worth it, That it's the right thing to do,  and that it will all pay off in the end. I am an EXTREMELY proud Marine Wife, and every morning when i roll over and see Riley's uniforms hanging in the closet(i can see them because i haven't hung up laundry in a LOOOOONG time and if i had they would be covered... besides the point) I get the warm fuzzies that what we have faith in as a family, IS right... we ARE doing the right thing, and this country IS worth it.

wow.. i'll stop ranting now :) keep Rye's unit in your prayers as well as Jaxon... Jaxon is home from the hospital (again!) he has one more round of chemo and then they are going to be preparing for surgery to remove the tumor, then he has a few more rounds of chemo and a bone marrow transplant... AND THEN HE TURNS 4! I am so proud of our Nephew, he is such a strong kid. And his parents are amazing, i don't know how they do it, but they inspire me daily!

I FOUND MY MOTO!!!!!!!

For all you non-military family folks... Moto is short for Motivation... but when you say MOTO instead, it makes you feel soo much more... more... more.... MOTO-ED. There ya go, you learn something everyday, and today i am proud to have provided that fact... AAAAAAAAANYWAY

So remember how last night i decided i am like morbidly obese... today while talking to my best friend Kat, i expressed that i felt like i have gained back every ounce that i lost last year. PLUS SOME... she asked me how much i had REALLY gained back, and i had to sheepishly admit to the whole 10-ish pounds... she let me know that with my months of roadtripping to see my amazing man, and months of hotel rooms, and living out of a suitcase, that it was perfectly NORMAL and OK to have gained some weight... plus when i finally DID have a house, i was trying to get settled into a new place.. it was the first time in a year i had my own place again. and shortly after i moved it, we got the date of his deployment, and i had to begin preparing for that... which for Riley meant stocking up on eating out, since he wouldn't get to for..... X amount of months. So, i don't hate myself as much... i mean i DO take responsibility, and had i had enough MOTO i could have found a way to continue losing while doing all that stuff... but c'mon I'M NOT WONDER WOMAN!!!! So even though i FEEL as though i am starting from scratch... i'm not. i also tried to tell her that i just didn't have enough time to lose what i wanted before he gets back... well... that was a dead argument, as i lost 30 pounds in like 10 weeks last year... and i have waay more than that many weeks left.

I decided to start my smoothies again. Before Riley left for boot, he would make us a "spinach" smoothie EVERYDAY, and we would go on like a 3 mile walk around his parents loop, talk about the future and drink our smoothies. and they were ALL amazing.... except for that one time that Rye decided to put ginger in, and he didn't quite realize how strong ginger was, and he put like a 2 inch section of ginger root in... ya that was NASTY... the BEST way to go about this was to drive to cost co, and fill the fridge with all the food Riley and i NORMALLY eat (plus salmon, cause Rye doesn't eat it but i loooove it!!!) i spent more than i wanted to... but i haven't been grocery shopping in like 3 weeks... so... JUSTIFIED!!! and do you want to know what my fridge/freezer looks like now??? ok Rye PLLEEEAAASE don't be jealous.. this is just yet another thing you have to look forward to coming home for!!! right?!?!

PLEEASE look at all those colors!!! tell me that you would rather have spaghetti?! don't think so!

all my frozen stuff for smoothies, plus my frozen chicken and salmon.ignore the Popsicle's... they are freezer burnt.

sooo worth the money!!!

OK AAAAND  before i hit up costco, i ran to the place we have on base where i get free lightbulbs and air filters and grabbed a few airfilters... so before i put away groceries, i FINALLY got the nasty air filter out... ya it was grossss... SO to make you lose the appetite i gave you with my food pictures...

I here-by swear i will NEVER wait 5 months to change this... and maybe if Riley had done his job in the first place... i never would of had to sweat for 5 days... so the AC is FIXED... i am sitting here in shorts and a tank, and i can't feel my toes.. Deezul is hiding under a fleece blanket.. but he can DEAL because I HAVE AC AGAIN!!!!!!!

in an hour or so Dee and I are heading to North Shore for the evening, i'll take lots of pictures, but it's about time he and I had an awesome adventure :)

UGH!!!

Ok, so i did some MUCH needed shopping today... when i moved here, i packed what fit in ONE suitcase... and that is all i have had. CRAZY HUH! other than the occasional purchase.. which is like 3 or 4 skirts.. thats it. so i REALLY needed some more clothes. especially if i am going to mope around the house and not do laundry for weeks... it would be nice to have some clothes that smelt clean and fresh :) judge me if you will... but when i don't have Rye getting all close and intimate with me... i don't mind the smell... HAHAHA (don't worry, i am wearing clean clothes. and FOR SURE clean underwear... but sometimes i spill something on a skirt or pants... and still totally wear them again) like i said.. judge me, but my husband is OFF AT WAR!!! (yup, you better believe i am going to continue to use that excuse this entire deployment :) )

Back to my shopping story... so i was trying on clothes, and it made me feel absolutely MASSIVE... so i am going to go OVERBOARD on the working out slash eating healthy. i don't really have an excuse... i'm not working, so that is kind of my job.. as a house wife, it is my duty to work on the "wife" part of the description. i have once again quit Soda...  I KNOW I KNOW, i never should have started drinking it again.. but when Riley got back from bootcamp, he always wanted to "share" a drink so we didn't have to buy 2, and since he wasn't allowed soda at bootcamp, that's what he REALLY wanted... so i would have been EVIL to say no... i'm also re-giving up Salt... i am an absolute salt addict... and it is SOOO incredibly bad for you.. so 2 of my favorite things... are once again, OFF THE MENU. farewell Salt and Soda... i will miss you... except that i won't miss what you do to me... you've been selfish.

So i don't remember if i blogged about this, but my AC broke the other day.. about 4 days ago... ok so it was technically my fault, i didn't change the air filter, and it got soo dirty that it froze up.. so i had to thaw it out, and i have to replace the air filter... but i DIDN'T do this.. why you may be asking "Why Sav... why would you NOT do this small thing if it meant you could have nice cold air all the time" "BECAUSE MY HUSBAND IS AT WAR, AND IT'S HIS JOB TO CHANGE IT, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO!!!" i tried... and ended up near tears... not near enough to tears though, as i still have yet to have a major breakdown... i keep expecting it to happen, because history shows us ((yes, you can read back on my blog and prove this)) that i ALWAYS have a breakdown while he away.. unless i have finally perhaps, gotten the hang of this insane life... i keep feeling guilty for the money i've been spending for crafts and such.. but it honestly keeps me SOOOO busy, and i think it makes things a TON easier!!! and with all the amazing craft blogs i have come across recently, our bank account is in big trouble.

Speaking of expensive-ness, i just discovered ETSY last night (i know i know, i am WAAAAAAY behind on this one.) probably a very good thing... i spent about an hour last night looking up "biking" stuff... ya, can you tell i am married to a cyclist... i was laughing at jokes like "happiness is perfect chain tension" aaaand my favorite.. which i am TOTALLY getting this framed art in my house it reads "Marriage is a neat invention... then again, so is bike repair kits" buahaha, i know i am probably the only person that reads this blog that will get this... other than Rye, and he'll appreciate that he has rubbed off on me more than a little.

So total random tangent here. you all know how i quit biting my nails a year ago right... right, ok well they are getting stronger, but my problem now is, they are ALWAYS getting gross and dirty underneath them... i keep something with me to clean out under them... but it still grosses me out... is this normal, or should i be wearing latex gloves cause this island is disgusting... thoughts anyone...

By the way... it's been hitting me lately that i REALLY miss Riley and my other "brothers"... one of the boys is supposed to be getting out shortly after this deployment... but i hope he stays, i don't think he realizes how much he BELONGS... i think he would regret it for the rest of his life if he got out now, while most of his friends still had 4-5 years at least left. THINK ABOUT IT!!! (yes Rye you can pass on the message!)

Birthday Boy

So, another milestone has come and gone... i honestly meant to post about Riley's birthday on Friday when it actually was... but i've learned that if i keep myself BEYOND busy, i don't get sad. YUP YOU HEARD RIGHT.. I'VE LEARNED SOMETHING. I have been sooo busy with my friend Steph all week. but Friday was the first day in like 2 weeks that i didn't have anything planned... other than the Gym in the morning. I got home after the gym, was planning on hopping right in the shower (cause i was all sweaty and hot) but my mother in law called me to let me know she got her flowers.

Little background for you. On Riley's 20th birthday, he told me he wanted to go out and buy something for his mom, because she is the one who "birthed" him and she deserved presents as much as he did... cause she's the one who did all the work and should be celebrating. So we went out and got his mom something ( i think jewelery, but i'm not sure). Since then every year (with the exception of last year). He tries to get his mom a present... i know, you can all wipe a tear from your eyes, he definitely wins the greatest most sweetest son EVER award.

Since Riley is in country, we discussed that i would order his mom flowers from him. i spent a good long hour trying to figure out what ones to send, and finally decided on a bunch. She called to tell me that she LOVED them and they made her cry (she's a bawl baby, so that's not a surprise)... almost immediately after hanging up with her, Riley called me (so it's a good thing i didn't shower right away!!!). We talked about all the new pictures he posted on facebook, Laughed about a bunch of the new stories he told me (one included all the elements of an awesome story.. An Owl, An Attack, and a Chuck Norris Kick).. he then asked me about the flowers and wanted to make sure his mom got them, Asked what kind i got. When i told him he responded with "Was there any baby's breath in there?"
"ummm, no i don't think so."
"just a small little tip for the future... my mom LOVES baby's breath"
"i know, but all the arrangements with baby's breath were out of the price range we had discussed"
"oh, ok... just so you know for the future"

Seriously... i think he is the most Tender son in the world.

So my husband is now 24... that is crazy to me. i'm still 22.... for another few weeks :) I met Rye when he was 16. Time sure does fly when you're in love with your best friend! His birthday was on a milestone as far as the deployment goes.. so it was double exciting. It is sad though, the last time i got to celebrate his birthday with him he was turning 22... we didn't do anything too terribly exciting for that birthday, but i turned 21 about a month later, we went to the hinder/theory of a deadman concert that night, and then went to Vegas a week later to celebrate with Kat and Zack, by seeing KA ( a cirque du soile show) and that just seems like a lifetime ago...I love you Rye, we'll make your 25th beyond amazing! i promise!!!

On a different note... i am falling in LOVE with Regina Spektor. i think before long i'll be putting up one of her songs on here for you all. She's quirky and amazing!

I've been really busy with all the crafts i've been doing... i  can't post pictures of some of them, because i've been working on some AWESOME valentines day stuff... but i'm sending some of it to Riley, and he checks my blog and i don't want to ruin the surprise... but if you are really looking for a cute little idea for a valentines present, feel free to shoot me an e-mail, or hit me up on facebook. the others aren't secret, i just haven't finished. so i don't have any good pictures yet.. i will post them when i finish, which i hope will be today. i've acquired another cold.. i have the headache, body aches, sniffles... pretty much sucks.

Well Deezul is making me laugh, so i'm going to quit with this post, and go snuggle my little man. but i'll leave you with a few pictures!

one of my Valentine's crafts for the house :)

A Few of My Favorite Things

does this title REALLY need any explanation?! i don't think so... and if it does... well i can't think of anything witty to say that isn't a TOTAL jab at you :) this will be just a easy post about some of my favorite things! this isn't ALL of them... just a few that i LOVE.

1. PUPPY PLAY DATES!!! this is Deezul (duh) on the floor. Twitch is the white pup, and Lady is the little black one... this was taken after HOURS of playing... the actual playdate part of it is hard, cause Lady and Twitch are still babies, so they have accidents, so we're constantly having to watch them.but once they tucker themselves out... TOTALLY worth it!!!

2. my kindle. i LOVE this thing! the only down side is that books are usually less than $10 and all i have to do is click a button to buy them... so i am TRYING to control my book spending. but it is AMAZING. you find yourself reading MORE on there then you would if you were holding a book. seriously best invention ever!

3. my bodybugg... ok Riley got this for me for Christmas, and it is insanely cool! it tracks how much i'm sweating, the temp of my skin, as well as the electric current going through my skin, to accurately track how many calories i burn everyday. plus the online program lets me track my diet and figure out if i'm burning more than i'm eating or the other way around, they put together an eating plan for you, and you can see exactly how many calories you burn every minute of everyday. like i can tell when i'm kicking in my sleep... how cool is that?!?!?!!

4. anything from LUSH, i first discovered Lush on my New Orleans vacation back in 2007, when i fell in LOVE with their "i should coco" soap , it was an exfoliating soap with real coconut in it. everything is handmade and organic, and smells soo yummy! they just recently discontinued my soap(i thought i was going to CRY!!!) but i have a few other favorites. Jungle-is a conditioner, but also used to shave your legs, it makes my legs feel like silk for like 3 days. and their Catastrophe Cosmetic face mask(see above pictures) it has real smashed up blueberries in it, and i have to keep it in the fridge, so when you first put it on it's a very cold shock, but worth it once you wash it off!

Come Come Ye Saints

Well boys and girls, it's been a bit since my last post. i've been EXTREMELY busy so far this year! And we are only 9 days into it! wow crazy crazy crazy!!! today marks another week that Riley has been gone, which means 1 WEEK LESS!!! i don't know if i'm allowed to put actual numbers on here for weeks and such, but i'm not going to... sorry!

So, it's Sunday early afternoon, i just got back from 3 awesome hours of church. As i was sitting in Sacrament meeting, i was catching up on my Book of Mormon reading (my new years resolution is to finish the book of Mormon start to finish before Riley gets back, i figured thats about 3-ish pages a day to finish with PLENTY of time!) HOWEVER, with how busy i've been, i'll be the first to admit i am FAR from perfect, i usually write Riley's letters right before bed, and THEN read my scriptures and fall asleep... but lately it's all i can do to jot down a quick letter... which last night i TOTALLY fell asleep in the middle of writing. you can actually WATCH me fall asleep in the letters, haha random pen marks, jibberish, and words that get bigger and bigger and bigger haha probably just my tired self trying to be done so i can go to sleep.

back to my original point, i was sitting and catching up on my weeks reading, cause i need to be done with page 28 by tonight, and i was only on page 19... i know i know, slacker. BUT I'M TRYING!!! so i was reading and thinking about how i turned out the way i did. i mean i come from a family of 7- Dad, Mom, Sister, me, Brother, other Brother, and other Sister... and after my Dad kind of fell away from the church, pretty much all my sibblings did too... and here i am getting up EARLY on a Sunday to do my hair because i find going to church with gross un-done hair to be disrespectful to the Lord's house... i mean seriously, i am turning into a religious nut. haha but the further down that path i go, the happier i become... and i am SOOO happy that i have a husband who feels the same way. i was thinking today, about HOW we are going to go about raising our family (when the time is right)... i have ALL these thoughts and goals about how i WANT to teach them, and things i have witnessed in other families, and i know i probably sound like a broken record... but i absolutely HATE when people give the whole "oh you won't be like that when you have kids" or "oh you will be lucky to put a bra ON when you have kids" and "you may SAY you want to feed your kids healthy, but it's just not practical when you ACTUALLY have them".... i am NOT naive, i DO understand that things will be different when i "ACTUALLY" have kids... however, you don't KNOW what i'll be like.... nobody does... i know SOOOOO many amazing families in the church  who have raised their children in the same way Riley and I hope to. i mean look at my best friend Lauren's family... i actually credit her family ALOT for helping me stay so "church-oriented) i spent HUNDREDS of weeks at her families house, and every night before dinner, after the prayer, Papa-Francis would read a chapter from the book of mormon, and they would discuss... dinner was at 6 every night, and you had to eat your salad first, THEN you could eat the main course, and if ANY of you know the AMAZING Jonell, she is the most nutrition-conscious mother in the whole world. they ate from all the food groups, but ate meat sparingly, she makes everything from scratch! her own whip cream( dairy free), sour cream, cream of chicken soup... all HEALTHY! and she would take our favorite meals from local restaurants and clone them... and then tweak it to a healthy alternative.

She also had her house SOO organized, all the kids, all 7(at the time, there are more now) knew what chores they had to do daily, as well as to practice the Harp, Piano, or whatever instrument THEY played. i mean Lauren and i TOTALLY complained at times about having to sweep the kitchen before we could head out after Acting Up, but the house ran SMOOTHLY. it was a house i LOVED to spend time in. it was in no means PERFECT, but i don't know how to explain it... OH YES I DO!!! ok so i have this wall vinyl above my sliding door in back, it reads "HOME is everything that makes us feel Beautiful and Safe and Loved" now Riley HATES that quote... as he says... and keep in mind i'm totally doing my "Riley has such a deep voice and sounds like he's better than everyone i---impression" ( love you Rye) but he says "IT MAKES NO SENSE, HOW CAN A HOUSE MAKE YOU FEEL BEAUTIFUL????? thats gaaaaaaaaaaaay" hahaha but that is the feeling her house gave...

that house was honestly my 2nd home, her parents would chat with me, even if Lauren wasn't home, and give advice. her Dad made sure to let me know that if i ever needed a blessing i shouldn't hesitate to ask. It's been years since those "good ol' days" but as i think of how i want my family to BE, thats kind of the vision i have.... it's not too extreme... i don't think... and you can feel free to tell me that it's not reasonable, or that when i actually have kids, my priorities will be completely different. but i feel as women in the church, we focus ALOT on STRIVING for that kind of household... we understand that every family is going to be different, but we also understand that with the principles of the church, it is most definitely achievable.

I may not be a Mother right now... and who knows, i may never get the opportunity to be one. But i have this mental-notebook that i keep all sorts of "parenting gems" tucked away, for the right day. and i know Riley has done the same thing, so when we do have kids (if God allows us to be parents one day) you all better watch out... the Gardiner House will be a force to be reckoned with.

oh, and i was absolutely going to leave off on that note, however i forgot to mention that starting NEXT SUNDAY, i am going to strive, to keep the sabbath day as holy as possible.. it's not like i go out swearing and drinking right now, i just feel like that is an area i need to work on.. at church our lesson was about keeping the sabbath holy, AND HOLY COW!!! all those girls seem to have it all put together, i mean they don't do laundry or dishes, and some prepare meals for the oven on saturday, so they don't really have to cook... WOW.... i am FAAR from that.... and i'm NOT starting this today, because i absolutely HAVE to get dishes done, and the floor swept.... but i'm listening to MOTAB, so that makes it all ok... right?!?!?!?!

Farewell

Farewell 2010, i don't think i'll miss you all that much. i don't know that i have ever cried so much in a single year. I rang in 2010 with Kat, since our husbands were still at Bootcamp... we got so dressed up and pretty.. and i fell in love with a little game called DJ Hero... which i bought Riley for a just because present (even though it was TOTALLY for me, and we both knew it) i was soo sure that 2010 was going to be miles better than 2009.. i was kind of wrong though. 2009 was ROUGH, with getting ready for bootcamp, and the false alarms as to when him and Zack would be able to go. however we had ALOT of really fun vacations, a couple AWESOME concerts, and multiple Vegas trips with Kat and Zack (including our valentines trip when the 4 of us saw our first cirque du soleil show.... KA) all in all we had a fun year, as stressful and scary as it was.. it was FUN... 2010 started with us being apart... which is kind of strange how we are ALSO ending this year apart. like i've said before, we spent less than 50% of the year together.. i don't remember the exact percentage, but you can go back a few posts and see all the stats.

As much as i miss him, and ache for him to be here to make me laugh and hold me... i'm doing ok... last year's holidays' took it's toll on me, even though they were spent with Family and Friends... it almost was a reminder that Riley WASN'T there... and i was alone, everyone pity-ed me. I think that made it more difficult. spending them with people who completely UNDERSTAND what i am going through made it that much easier. I didn't have to explain why i didn't want to go somewhere, or explain why i teared up every time people would say how bad they felt that i was spending the holidays alone. People on base understand that i am just trying to survive this time apart so Riley doesn't have to add ME to his list of worries. thats WHY i'm trying to hold myself together so well, i want to make this as easy as possible for Rye as i can. If i'm at home crying on the phone every time he calls... he's going to stress out about me when we're not able to talk. But with me keeping a grip on myself... he can focus on just kicking trash in country (and making the afghani kids as mad as possible by speaking to them in German, which they don't understand) i WANT him to be able to laugh about different ways to irritate these kids, cause it keeps me entertained, and when people try to talk war with me... i tell them about Rye's recent funny story, and the topic is instantly changed :)

i'm hopeful this year, but i am not as cocky as i was last year, when i was so positive that i wouldn't have to be alone again this year. i hope i can be JUST as blessed this year to be able to spend lots of time with my amazing best friend.

I don't want to make this post too uber long, cause it's new years eve, and i should go do something, like drive over to Sam's and watch the ball drop... while watching her fold laundry :) not exciting i know... but hey, this is just another milestone i would like to be past!

by the way, Jaxon started his new round of Chemo, it's a MUCH stronger version... he's nauseas, but doing really well.

Riley just called so i will go ring in the new year talking to Rye

Fairy Tale

Now that Riley has been gone for a while (far too long!) i've had alot of extra time on my hands. you're probably wondering what a Marine wife does all day to keep her mind from the obvious... well it depends on the day, but here is a little list of things that keep me busy most days. when i'm not running errands or doing pictures.. just the "at home" stuff.

1. Dishes (i can't believe how often i have to do this with just me)
2. Shower (yes, finding the motivation to do this is difficult when you don't have a husband around who informs you that you smell "ripe"... but i still do it daily!)
3. Laundry (even though when i'm home i try and stay in Rye's sweats for most of the day)
4. sweeping and mopping (i have a dog.. he drools.. and gets hair all over)
5. Play with the puppy, and play with him enough to tire him out so that when you're exhausted.. he doesn't want to attack you to make you play)
6. keeping food in the house (once again, this one is hard to find motivation to do... i go somedays with maybe eating one meal)
7. Reading... ALOT of reading, i recently got a Kindle. it may be the best invention EVER... except now that i can buy books with the click of a button... i do.
8. Chick Flix... i have Netflix so i watch alot of instant netflix, usually at night.. when everyone else is home with their families and everyone on the mainland is asleep so i get lonely.

So this post is actually about that last one. I am a total sucker for chick flix.. but not the uber cheesy ones, those irritate me. some of my favorites include...

• P.s. I Love You
• The Notebook
• The Last Song
• My Best Friends Wedding
• Pretty Woman
• A Walk to Remember
• Eat Pray Love
• Pride and Prejudice
• Titanic
• 50 First Dates
• You've Got Mail

Now those are only to name a FEW!!! pretty much any chick flick can catch my attention. except that stupid one that came out this last year "Letters to Juliet"...............LAME But that's just my opinion.. and this is my blog so i can say what i want about it :)

I was watching a movie the other day which is what made me think of this though. i was watching Eat Pray love, and when she meets the man of her dreams (the same guy that the girl in P.s. i love you meets) i had that typical girl moment of... "awwww i wish i had a fairy tale like that! i want to meet a gorgeous scruffy man and kiss him oh so passionately"  or something along those lines. but as i was sitting here swooning over this guy.. i realized that he looks alot like what Riley will look like in 20 years

Javier Bardem

My Better Half :)

now the hair is OBVIOUSLY different.. but all in all... fairly similar considering the age difference. as i was realizing how similar they are... i realized the ONLY thing i'm missing for the fairy tale of my dreams is for him to have an accent :) however... IF Riley had an accent he would say really awkward things and wouldn't realize how awkward they are... haha off topic!!!

Anyway!!! so i was putting all of this together in my mind, and i came to the realization.. i already HAVE my fairytale! it started the night i met him on the blind date and wasn't crazy about him, and how he chased me for months! (even though he'll TOTALLY claim he wasn't chasing me he just didn't date me because he had "better" things to do... believe what you want cute bum) down to the night he first held my hand during the midnight showing of Harry Potter 3... and a few weeks later when he asked if i would be his first kiss... and a few months later when we first said we loved each other. The countless nights we spent sitting on the side of the rock canyon bowl just talking about EVERYTHING in life, snuggled up in his sisters fleece blanket that we have stolen. The night he asked me to marry him, a few weeks after we'd had a fight, and i didn't think he would WANT to marry me... and how it started to POUR snow as soon as he asked me. The night before we got married, when he told me he didn't want a bachelor party, and the thing he wanted to do most was take me out one last time before i became his Mrs. we took his dad's jeep out on the trails behind their house and went Stargazing on the roof of the jeep, while listening to Bryan Adams... just like we had when we first fell in love.. only this time he brought along a little 4 pack of my favorite flavor jones soda...

All leading up to the moment that i walked down the aisle wearing my Aunts wedding dress (that i told her YEARS before when i was like 8 that i wanted to wear it one day when i got married) and i was able to marry my very best friend. We've definitely had our ups and downs... we struggle... but mostly we struggle with ourself, not so much with each other anymore... i've made more memories with him, than i ever did with my sibblings. we started out as an awkward couple... the girl that none of the guys wanted to date... just wanted to be "friends" with... and the boy, who had never dated, never kissed, and had never had his heart broken... and wasn't near as good looking as he's turned out to be :) but we've made it soo far. it's now been over 7 years since we first met at the Haunted Forest in American Fork, where you wore your red Forum hoodie, and those jeans that i hate and trashed looong ago :) and then you and Sterling took Meg and I on a moonlit picnic with spaghetti, Grapes, and martineli's and you bent your knife trying to open the Martineli's since you were dumb and forgot a bottle opener. :)

And another thing... in MOST of these movies, there is a common thing. Tragedy and heartbreak... in order for MOST if not ALL these girls to find their happy ending... and i mean yea i had a few heartbreaks, and a few tough choices, it was all worth it. every time i was told i wasn't pretty enough, every boy that cheated on me (and the one that i walked in on) all the tears i cried over STUPID boys, it all led me to my happy ending. we still have a loong road ahead of us, we still have a bunch more trials, and like i've said before, with the foundation we've built those will be just little bumps in the road. and hopefully we'll be able to continue to work together and NOT against each other in our difficult times, cause it makes it SOO much easier to have a partner.

Wow, this has been an UBER mushy post.. but i haven't blogged in a while.. and i wanted a good one for the end of the year... so here you go 2010, going out with a BANG!!! :)

Remember to Keep Riley's unit in your prayers! and continue praying for Jaxon, he's starting his 3rd round of chemo i believe tomorrow. He is responding well to treatments so far, but we don't want to get cocky... so keep the faith and the prayers coming!

Merry Christmas!!!

Well it is Christmas Morning, i'm trying to catch up on my blog while over at Sam's house, since i still have to get a new computer... so i'll try to make this quick.

last night, i was invited over to a girl in the wards house for Christmas Eve i assumed it would be her, her husband and her three boys, who i assumed were like 10 and 12, as well as the missionaries... i wasn't expecting to be one of 3 females in a house full of 12 guys all in their twenties, i was more than a little outnumbered :) but anyone that knows me, knows that i am usually just one of the guys, so i had alot of fun! i don't remember the last time i laughed soo much! it started out a little awkward, we were decorating cookies, but as soon as they realized i was TOTALLY fine with them making fun of me for putting each sprinkle on individually, the jokes started and things loosened up :)

my pretty cookies!!!

My Tree!

 

Santa's Sleigh :) you're impressed!

After they finished their cookies, they moved onto the Gingerbread houses(graham cracker) however, i was spending waay too much time on my cookies so i didn't get a chance to finish my house properly... one of the Elders actually made the New Zealand temple (where he's from) it looked SWEET i wish i got a picture of it.

my unfinished house

after that we had a fantastic meal of Steak, Baked Potatoes, corn on the cob and salad.. SOO good!!! then we played Spoons (VERY dangerous if you play with a bunch of 20-something yr old guys) and to calm down we played Uno (where the REAL danger started... emotional abuse :) haha) we were messing with eachother trying to get them to play whatever card we NEEDED. after we got all card gamed out! we headed in and played a few rounds of Wii bowling before we called it a night. that was soo much fun, even though they said i bowled like Charles Barkley trying to golf... try figuring that one out.

So Merry Christmas, Riley Got me one of the things i REALLY wanted and have wanted for a few years now, he got me the Body Bugg, i wear it on my arm 24/7 and it tracks EVERY calorie that i burn, then i upload it on the computer, and track what i've eaten... it's basically amazing!!!

and LOOK it's even zebra printed.

So Merry Merry Christmas. don't worry about me, my Christmas Eve was the best it could have been with the situation i'm in... i am still holding up pretty strong! i hope each of you has a FANTASTIC Christmas, and that you are able to spend it with as many loved ones as you can. Thank you for sticking around and reading all my bi-polar blog posts :)

Adventures of a girl and her Dog- Rainy Day

It's the Rainy season here in Hawaii, a few weeks ago Deezul and I had a rainy day. this was RIGHT before he broke my computer. i think he broke it later that night. but we had a nice relaxing day, it was really nice! so here is a picture play-by-play of our day :)

Playing out in the Rain

The wind blows his ears up like this all the time, makes me laugh.

wants to come inside

playing with the palm tree leaf he ripped out of the tree

tired from all the playing.

Soo much rain!

just watching the world

this is what he does almost EVERY day!

playing with the leaf again

Me listening to my Sirius Radio ALL day!!!

lighting candles, and enjoying the day!

really pretty rainy sunset!!!