Brave

I wish i was brave. i'm not. but i wish i was. Those people who have youtube channels of themselves singing.. THEY are brave... even those people that really SHOULDN'T have video's up... that takes an insane amount of courage. i mean it took alot for me to put up a few videos of me performing on facebook. and now i usually just stick to belting NSYNC in the car with my sibling's videos :)  i don't NEEEEEED to post videos, i just kind of wish i was brave enough to like i dunno... sing karaoke. i've only done it once, and that was with a few other girls at some little state fair, and we sang footloose, but it was a TINY karaoke booth so no one was even around and watching other than our friends. i've performed lots of times... but that's when people EXPECT you to be good... When Rye and I were on our Bahama cruise a few years ago, we sat in on the karaoke competition... and i REALLY wanted to go sign up... but i was too chicken. and Riley HATES karaoke... :) so we only stayed for like 3 songs and then left... and every time i mention going to like a karaoke club or bar or something.. (just for the karaoke of course) he shoots that idea down real quick. so maybe while he's gone i need to organize a girls night out for karaoke or something... or maybe...................... if he loves me ALOT, and after reading this realizes it's something i REALLY want to do.. maybe we'll get together with a bunch of the guys when they get back and go do karaoke.

Smooth Criminal

First things first... Steph asked me to clarify that she only sleeps half the day when she works graveyard... she didn't want all my blog readers to think she was simply lazy... now that i got that out of the way!

ON TO THE POST! p.s. i'm typing this post with wet fingernails... i don't know why i feel the need to tell you this since i'll fix any typo-s and you all don't care how long it takes me to type this.... but now you know.

I don't really know what i'm planning on posting about... not that it's rare for me to post without something in mind... hopefully i'll think of something...

Riley is doing well, he's bored and in his words he "feels like a caged Lion" which sucks for him, but helps me sleep at night to know he's bored :) RATHER YOU BE BORED THAN BE MISSING A THUMB! All the boys seem to be doing good as well. Alot of them have SOOO many deep rooted issues, and i just want to be the "sister" and let them get it all off their chests, cause alot of them honestly feel like they are terrible people. But i know that they feel odd talking to me about all of this, they see me as the person i have become in the last year (A Mormon girl who tries as HARD as possible to follow the principals of our religion) i wasn't always that girl, i made plenty of mistakes. i joke around that Riley is this PERFECT guy, and i'm extremely flawed... but when it comes down to it, thats not too far from the truth. I know he has his flaws... we all know about the gold wrappers, and the fast food cups in the sink... when he gets stressed out, he snaps at me (but i've learned this and don't say ANYTHING back to his remarks... and within the hour he appologizes for snapping, and i win that argument without EVER engaging in it) he called me his mom once... it took ALOT for me to keep my mouth shut on that one... but i'm glad i did :) he forces me to go biking, when it's not something i genuinely enjoy(try as i might!) and when i really want something, he usually responds with "we'll see" which 99% of the time means no... but those are TINY flaws... even though they sure as heck feel like HUGE ones when i want to rip his throat out :)

mine are far deeper than that. I've done things i'm not proud of, but i'm not ashamed of my past.. it made me into the girl i am today.

I have a new addiction to shopping.. KAT, you've created a MONSTER!!! until last year when Riley was at bootcamp, i'll be the first to admit, i really didn't have a sense of fashion... i mean i just wore jeans and t-shirts, that was about it, and the Kat helped me evolve into the money spending monster i've become. When i quit biting my nails, i would paint them almost daily with all the awesome nail polish Kat had in her collection. then we were pulled apart and i was forced to get my OWN nail polish. i didn't want just the wet n' wild, cause that stuff doesn't work as well, look as nice, and it dries up on me way too fast! So i was in a predicament cause i didn't want to spend $5-$8 a bottle... Riley however didn't see a problem with that and bought me my first bottle of Sally Hansen's HD nail polish.. it's smurf blue, and i don't wear it all that often... but i fell in LOOOOVE!!! here i am, 11 months later with at least 16 nail polish bottles... only 3 of which are clear polish... yea... it's a problem! BUT i bought a new color last night and i LOOOOVE it.. i call it Mermaid Tail, even though thats not the official name!

Smurf Blue... it looks just as bright ON! probably why it's HD

my now somewhat large nail polish collection

Mermaid Tail

Mermaid Tail... applied.

but on my shopping trip last night i bought a new purse.. it was on sale really cheap.. and i REALLY needed a new purse, my black one i've had for like 2 years has been starting to rip for a while now... LOOK HOW CUTE!!

My Mailman stopped by my house the other day and told me i owed him 51 cents in order to recieve this letter that was sent to me, because the sender put two stamps on but it didn't fully cover the cost... LAME HUH?! anyway it was from Kat, it was this CUTE necklace she made me. she made it with Beach Glass we found on our weekend in Cali when we camped on the beach. all the girls are TOTALLY jealous of it! as they should be cause it's sooo dang cute!!

So ya.... there are a few pictures for you... all of those things make me VERY happy this week :) I've also recently discovered "stumbleupon.com" it is AMAZING!!! and i have sooo many more craft ideas now.. ugh... dangerous!!! anyway i'll leave you with this awesome video i stumbled upon!

Makin' Me Fall In Love Again

I am sitting in bed waiting for Steph(my good friend here) to wake up so we can hit up the gym... HOWEVER, that girl likes to sleep... ok that's a bit unfair, I get up at 6:30-7 every morning. So someone who sleeps till 9 or 10 seems crazy to me :) I figured i'd throw up a new blog post, accomplish something.

A few days ago i got an e-mail from one of my boys desperately needing a copy of his DL, he said it was in a box in our storage unit on the top of the box, and asked if i could possibly find it. Now normally i would have said No. Since the boys have been gone, they are constantly asking for favors..."Sav can you dig through a box and send me my vitamins" or "Sav can you get my hoodie and send it to me" to those i say SHOVE IT! it's a bit more difficult when they order things, ship it to my house, and then ask ME to ship it to them... i don't understand why they don't send it to their parents house and have THEM pay to ship it, or shove it in a box already going to them... Sending a care package every week is NOT cheap, each package is worth roughly $60-$100 and then costs another $15 to send... it add up!!! so when i am adding an extra $15 into my monthly package budget, i do get a little irritated... but back to my story, being brave and having a heart i decided to embark upon the adventure of uncovering the lost drivers license

ya..... looks fun... huh?

He told me his box had a G spray painted on the side and circled... ya, so did alot of the other guys. i found this out after opening 6 boxes that were NOT his!

almost found it at this point.

If you notice in this last picture, one of the boys left a fan in my storage closet... ya that would have been nice during my 5 days without AC. someone ELSE left a huge pocketknife and it was just sitting on the top near the front.. now i already have a fear of someone hiding in this closet and then jumping out and attacking me while i'm unlocking my door, especially since my front porch lightbulb went out... and NOW i find out that one of my boys that i hold so dear to my heart.... LEFT THIS GUY A WEAPON!!!!! i flipped out and took the knife, i don't know who it belongs to, cause it was not in a box... but they can have it back when they get back, until then... that is going somewhere around this house along with the other weapons i have stashed. YEA try and pillage this house, see what happens! I did end up finding his DL, however he didn't get the copy quick enough and they dropped him from the class he needed it for.. oops!

On a different note, Deezul chewed up my hot glue gun. Dee and I have an agreement, he doesn't chew on furniture, wires or anything important... however, when i leave a foreign object lying around the house... it's free game. let's just say, he destroyed the first 8 chapters of a hard cover book a few months ago, because i left it out. and who can forget the picture of him with the cream sheets covered in black ink. all of these are MY fault, as i left it lying about. The hot glue gun had been knocked off my "craft" table, and i just forgot to pick it up, so when i got home... here's what i found.

Ya, so it's the first cord he's ever chewed, but it's because it was attached to the blue thing he really had his sights set on. luckily it was only a cheap $3 hot glue gun... so i had to wait 2 days, go to the craft store, and i bought 2! now i have a back up.

To totally jump subjects again, after my big costco shopping trip last week with all my yummy food, i was craving chocolate... BAD! so i decided to fill my craving but in a slightly healthier way....

And then a few days ago, Steph and I were at costco and sampled some meatballs, and they were AMAZING. I bought some, and decided to make a quick stir fry out of them... so Steph went and played Nazi Zombies, while i cooked up this amazingly easy and yummy meal! it turned out ALOT better than i was expecting.

Along with a yummy smoothie

It was sooooo Good!!

I spent yesterday morning madly cleaning my apartment, The Missionaries were coming over around lunchtime, and i had put off cleaning(SOOO unlike me... hahahaha). So now the house is pretty clean, i do need new paper towels so i can Windex the back sliding door, Since Deezul gets that so disgustingly dirty. My next task is going to be to hang up all my laundry, and then maybe the bathroom. Wow, like you all care about my chores haha. the point i was going to get to eventually, was that... While cleaning i had pandora up on my PS3 listening to a new station i created, and this song came on by Kellie Pickler



And then of course... The Lyrics!

Makin' Me Fall In Love Again Lyrics

People will tell ya that this kind of love will fade
That being in love like this is only a phase
But baby after all this time ain't nothin' changed
All you gotta do is look at me that way

And there you go
Makin' me fall in love again
There you go
Makin' me fall in love again
Oh and I gotta tell ya, there's nothin' better
You and me together, workin' on forever
Everyday with you is always somethin' new
You only gotta be yourself
And there you go
Makin' me fall in love again

Baby sometimes you can say the craziest things
I love how you don't care what nobody thinks
You're highly original, totally in-typical
Never change
All I gotta do is look at your smiling face

And there you go
Makin' me fall in love again
There you go
Makin' me fall in love again
Oh and I gotta tell ya, there's nothin' better
You and me together, workin' on forever
Everyday with you is always somethin' new
You only gotta be yourself
And there you go
Makin' me fall in love again

You're my sunshine, you're my rain
Sure feels good to know you feel the same

I gotta tell ya, there's nothin' better
You and me together, workin' on forever
Everyday with you is always somethin' new
You only gotta be yourself
And there you go
Makin' me fall in love again
There you go
Makin' me fall in love again
There you go
Makin' me fall in love again
There you go, there you go   Also, before i end this post, today is my best friend Kat's birthday! WOOOOO!!!!! there are three people in this world i consider to be my best friend... Riley! Kat! and Lauren! Riley of course is my number 1, there is no contest! but Lauren and Kat are always there for me, Lauren being one of my oldest friends,While Kat and I share the unique bond of our husbands being best friends, as well as having both of them join the Marines together, and going through this journey with another girl who totally understands what i'm going through. and Today that pretty girl is turning 23! i would make a crack about how old she's getting, but i'll be there in 12 days... so i'm gonna keep my mouth shut :)

Oh Say Can You See!

for those of you that are friends with me on facebook, you may have seen my status this afternoon about our National Anthem... i honestly think it is one of the most gorgeous songs ever. i've been to numerous events with Riley(dirt biking, car races) and 9 times out of 10, whoever is singing... BUTCHERS the song. it IS an extremely difficult song to sing, but those who CAN sing it, can give me chills (and if they are really good, make my eyes water). Having my husband join the military was not something we were planning on when we were 16, laying in the grass talking about our futures. Heck, it wasn't something we were planning on when i was 20 and we were laying in the grass talking about our future. it's funny how things play out. I've always LOVED this song, i had the priveledge of singing it twice now, (once with a group of about 6 when i was still living in washington.. and i'm sure i sounded like a chipmunk, and the 2nd time was with my long time best friend Lauren, at our schools basketball game) i'd like to think i didn't butcher it for people... except for the first time, but i was like 9 and thats to be expected :) but i was NO WHERE near the point of giving anyone the chills. haha, usually about once every 6-9 months... i get re-addicted to this song, and listen to like a BILLION renditions on youtube. today friends, was one of those days. so for your listening pleasure, here is my pick of the day. :)


GLEE! i LOOOVE this version! she is insanely talented!!!

i'm so thankful for our country, and for all the Brave people who defend it... including that amazing man i married, many years before the military was a real option for him and us. We have it SOOOOO Good because of guys like him who are willing to lay down their own life, if it comes to that, and for what? purely for the love of their country, even if they don't agree with past or current leaders, they stand for the ideal of America... They hold on with the Faith that our country is worth it, that our cause is worth it, That it's the right thing to do,  and that it will all pay off in the end. I am an EXTREMELY proud Marine Wife, and every morning when i roll over and see Riley's uniforms hanging in the closet(i can see them because i haven't hung up laundry in a LOOOOONG time and if i had they would be covered... besides the point) I get the warm fuzzies that what we have faith in as a family, IS right... we ARE doing the right thing, and this country IS worth it.

wow.. i'll stop ranting now :) keep Rye's unit in your prayers as well as Jaxon... Jaxon is home from the hospital (again!) he has one more round of chemo and then they are going to be preparing for surgery to remove the tumor, then he has a few more rounds of chemo and a bone marrow transplant... AND THEN HE TURNS 4! I am so proud of our Nephew, he is such a strong kid. And his parents are amazing, i don't know how they do it, but they inspire me daily!

I FOUND MY MOTO!!!!!!!

For all you non-military family folks... Moto is short for Motivation... but when you say MOTO instead, it makes you feel soo much more... more... more.... MOTO-ED. There ya go, you learn something everyday, and today i am proud to have provided that fact... AAAAAAAAANYWAY

So remember how last night i decided i am like morbidly obese... today while talking to my best friend Kat, i expressed that i felt like i have gained back every ounce that i lost last year. PLUS SOME... she asked me how much i had REALLY gained back, and i had to sheepishly admit to the whole 10-ish pounds... she let me know that with my months of roadtripping to see my amazing man, and months of hotel rooms, and living out of a suitcase, that it was perfectly NORMAL and OK to have gained some weight... plus when i finally DID have a house, i was trying to get settled into a new place.. it was the first time in a year i had my own place again. and shortly after i moved it, we got the date of his deployment, and i had to begin preparing for that... which for Riley meant stocking up on eating out, since he wouldn't get to for..... X amount of months. So, i don't hate myself as much... i mean i DO take responsibility, and had i had enough MOTO i could have found a way to continue losing while doing all that stuff... but c'mon I'M NOT WONDER WOMAN!!!! So even though i FEEL as though i am starting from scratch... i'm not. i also tried to tell her that i just didn't have enough time to lose what i wanted before he gets back... well... that was a dead argument, as i lost 30 pounds in like 10 weeks last year... and i have waay more than that many weeks left.

I decided to start my smoothies again. Before Riley left for boot, he would make us a "spinach" smoothie EVERYDAY, and we would go on like a 3 mile walk around his parents loop, talk about the future and drink our smoothies. and they were ALL amazing.... except for that one time that Rye decided to put ginger in, and he didn't quite realize how strong ginger was, and he put like a 2 inch section of ginger root in... ya that was NASTY... the BEST way to go about this was to drive to cost co, and fill the fridge with all the food Riley and i NORMALLY eat (plus salmon, cause Rye doesn't eat it but i loooove it!!!) i spent more than i wanted to... but i haven't been grocery shopping in like 3 weeks... so... JUSTIFIED!!! and do you want to know what my fridge/freezer looks like now??? ok Rye PLLEEEAAASE don't be jealous.. this is just yet another thing you have to look forward to coming home for!!! right?!?!

PLEEASE look at all those colors!!! tell me that you would rather have spaghetti?! don't think so!

all my frozen stuff for smoothies, plus my frozen chicken and salmon.ignore the Popsicle's... they are freezer burnt.

sooo worth the money!!!

OK AAAAND  before i hit up costco, i ran to the place we have on base where i get free lightbulbs and air filters and grabbed a few airfilters... so before i put away groceries, i FINALLY got the nasty air filter out... ya it was grossss... SO to make you lose the appetite i gave you with my food pictures...

I here-by swear i will NEVER wait 5 months to change this... and maybe if Riley had done his job in the first place... i never would of had to sweat for 5 days... so the AC is FIXED... i am sitting here in shorts and a tank, and i can't feel my toes.. Deezul is hiding under a fleece blanket.. but he can DEAL because I HAVE AC AGAIN!!!!!!!

in an hour or so Dee and I are heading to North Shore for the evening, i'll take lots of pictures, but it's about time he and I had an awesome adventure :)

UGH!!!

Ok, so i did some MUCH needed shopping today... when i moved here, i packed what fit in ONE suitcase... and that is all i have had. CRAZY HUH! other than the occasional purchase.. which is like 3 or 4 skirts.. thats it. so i REALLY needed some more clothes. especially if i am going to mope around the house and not do laundry for weeks... it would be nice to have some clothes that smelt clean and fresh :) judge me if you will... but when i don't have Rye getting all close and intimate with me... i don't mind the smell... HAHAHA (don't worry, i am wearing clean clothes. and FOR SURE clean underwear... but sometimes i spill something on a skirt or pants... and still totally wear them again) like i said.. judge me, but my husband is OFF AT WAR!!! (yup, you better believe i am going to continue to use that excuse this entire deployment :) )

Back to my shopping story... so i was trying on clothes, and it made me feel absolutely MASSIVE... so i am going to go OVERBOARD on the working out slash eating healthy. i don't really have an excuse... i'm not working, so that is kind of my job.. as a house wife, it is my duty to work on the "wife" part of the description. i have once again quit Soda...  I KNOW I KNOW, i never should have started drinking it again.. but when Riley got back from bootcamp, he always wanted to "share" a drink so we didn't have to buy 2, and since he wasn't allowed soda at bootcamp, that's what he REALLY wanted... so i would have been EVIL to say no... i'm also re-giving up Salt... i am an absolute salt addict... and it is SOOO incredibly bad for you.. so 2 of my favorite things... are once again, OFF THE MENU. farewell Salt and Soda... i will miss you... except that i won't miss what you do to me... you've been selfish.

So i don't remember if i blogged about this, but my AC broke the other day.. about 4 days ago... ok so it was technically my fault, i didn't change the air filter, and it got soo dirty that it froze up.. so i had to thaw it out, and i have to replace the air filter... but i DIDN'T do this.. why you may be asking "Why Sav... why would you NOT do this small thing if it meant you could have nice cold air all the time" "BECAUSE MY HUSBAND IS AT WAR, AND IT'S HIS JOB TO CHANGE IT, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO!!!" i tried... and ended up near tears... not near enough to tears though, as i still have yet to have a major breakdown... i keep expecting it to happen, because history shows us ((yes, you can read back on my blog and prove this)) that i ALWAYS have a breakdown while he away.. unless i have finally perhaps, gotten the hang of this insane life... i keep feeling guilty for the money i've been spending for crafts and such.. but it honestly keeps me SOOOO busy, and i think it makes things a TON easier!!! and with all the amazing craft blogs i have come across recently, our bank account is in big trouble.

Speaking of expensive-ness, i just discovered ETSY last night (i know i know, i am WAAAAAAY behind on this one.) probably a very good thing... i spent about an hour last night looking up "biking" stuff... ya, can you tell i am married to a cyclist... i was laughing at jokes like "happiness is perfect chain tension" aaaand my favorite.. which i am TOTALLY getting this framed art in my house it reads "Marriage is a neat invention... then again, so is bike repair kits" buahaha, i know i am probably the only person that reads this blog that will get this... other than Rye, and he'll appreciate that he has rubbed off on me more than a little.

So total random tangent here. you all know how i quit biting my nails a year ago right... right, ok well they are getting stronger, but my problem now is, they are ALWAYS getting gross and dirty underneath them... i keep something with me to clean out under them... but it still grosses me out... is this normal, or should i be wearing latex gloves cause this island is disgusting... thoughts anyone...

By the way... it's been hitting me lately that i REALLY miss Riley and my other "brothers"... one of the boys is supposed to be getting out shortly after this deployment... but i hope he stays, i don't think he realizes how much he BELONGS... i think he would regret it for the rest of his life if he got out now, while most of his friends still had 4-5 years at least left. THINK ABOUT IT!!! (yes Rye you can pass on the message!)

Birthday Boy

So, another milestone has come and gone... i honestly meant to post about Riley's birthday on Friday when it actually was... but i've learned that if i keep myself BEYOND busy, i don't get sad. YUP YOU HEARD RIGHT.. I'VE LEARNED SOMETHING. I have been sooo busy with my friend Steph all week. but Friday was the first day in like 2 weeks that i didn't have anything planned... other than the Gym in the morning. I got home after the gym, was planning on hopping right in the shower (cause i was all sweaty and hot) but my mother in law called me to let me know she got her flowers.

Little background for you. On Riley's 20th birthday, he told me he wanted to go out and buy something for his mom, because she is the one who "birthed" him and she deserved presents as much as he did... cause she's the one who did all the work and should be celebrating. So we went out and got his mom something ( i think jewelery, but i'm not sure). Since then every year (with the exception of last year). He tries to get his mom a present... i know, you can all wipe a tear from your eyes, he definitely wins the greatest most sweetest son EVER award.

Since Riley is in country, we discussed that i would order his mom flowers from him. i spent a good long hour trying to figure out what ones to send, and finally decided on a bunch. She called to tell me that she LOVED them and they made her cry (she's a bawl baby, so that's not a surprise)... almost immediately after hanging up with her, Riley called me (so it's a good thing i didn't shower right away!!!). We talked about all the new pictures he posted on facebook, Laughed about a bunch of the new stories he told me (one included all the elements of an awesome story.. An Owl, An Attack, and a Chuck Norris Kick).. he then asked me about the flowers and wanted to make sure his mom got them, Asked what kind i got. When i told him he responded with "Was there any baby's breath in there?"
"ummm, no i don't think so."
"just a small little tip for the future... my mom LOVES baby's breath"
"i know, but all the arrangements with baby's breath were out of the price range we had discussed"
"oh, ok... just so you know for the future"

Seriously... i think he is the most Tender son in the world.

So my husband is now 24... that is crazy to me. i'm still 22.... for another few weeks :) I met Rye when he was 16. Time sure does fly when you're in love with your best friend! His birthday was on a milestone as far as the deployment goes.. so it was double exciting. It is sad though, the last time i got to celebrate his birthday with him he was turning 22... we didn't do anything too terribly exciting for that birthday, but i turned 21 about a month later, we went to the hinder/theory of a deadman concert that night, and then went to Vegas a week later to celebrate with Kat and Zack, by seeing KA ( a cirque du soile show) and that just seems like a lifetime ago...I love you Rye, we'll make your 25th beyond amazing! i promise!!!

On a different note... i am falling in LOVE with Regina Spektor. i think before long i'll be putting up one of her songs on here for you all. She's quirky and amazing!

I've been really busy with all the crafts i've been doing... i  can't post pictures of some of them, because i've been working on some AWESOME valentines day stuff... but i'm sending some of it to Riley, and he checks my blog and i don't want to ruin the surprise... but if you are really looking for a cute little idea for a valentines present, feel free to shoot me an e-mail, or hit me up on facebook. the others aren't secret, i just haven't finished. so i don't have any good pictures yet.. i will post them when i finish, which i hope will be today. i've acquired another cold.. i have the headache, body aches, sniffles... pretty much sucks.

Well Deezul is making me laugh, so i'm going to quit with this post, and go snuggle my little man. but i'll leave you with a few pictures!

one of my Valentine's crafts for the house :)

A Few of My Favorite Things

does this title REALLY need any explanation?! i don't think so... and if it does... well i can't think of anything witty to say that isn't a TOTAL jab at you :) this will be just a easy post about some of my favorite things! this isn't ALL of them... just a few that i LOVE.

1. PUPPY PLAY DATES!!! this is Deezul (duh) on the floor. Twitch is the white pup, and Lady is the little black one... this was taken after HOURS of playing... the actual playdate part of it is hard, cause Lady and Twitch are still babies, so they have accidents, so we're constantly having to watch them.but once they tucker themselves out... TOTALLY worth it!!!

2. my kindle. i LOVE this thing! the only down side is that books are usually less than $10 and all i have to do is click a button to buy them... so i am TRYING to control my book spending. but it is AMAZING. you find yourself reading MORE on there then you would if you were holding a book. seriously best invention ever!

3. my bodybugg... ok Riley got this for me for Christmas, and it is insanely cool! it tracks how much i'm sweating, the temp of my skin, as well as the electric current going through my skin, to accurately track how many calories i burn everyday. plus the online program lets me track my diet and figure out if i'm burning more than i'm eating or the other way around, they put together an eating plan for you, and you can see exactly how many calories you burn every minute of everyday. like i can tell when i'm kicking in my sleep... how cool is that?!?!?!!

4. anything from LUSH, i first discovered Lush on my New Orleans vacation back in 2007, when i fell in LOVE with their "i should coco" soap , it was an exfoliating soap with real coconut in it. everything is handmade and organic, and smells soo yummy! they just recently discontinued my soap(i thought i was going to CRY!!!) but i have a few other favorites. Jungle-is a conditioner, but also used to shave your legs, it makes my legs feel like silk for like 3 days. and their Catastrophe Cosmetic face mask(see above pictures) it has real smashed up blueberries in it, and i have to keep it in the fridge, so when you first put it on it's a very cold shock, but worth it once you wash it off!

Come Come Ye Saints

Well boys and girls, it's been a bit since my last post. i've been EXTREMELY busy so far this year! And we are only 9 days into it! wow crazy crazy crazy!!! today marks another week that Riley has been gone, which means 1 WEEK LESS!!! i don't know if i'm allowed to put actual numbers on here for weeks and such, but i'm not going to... sorry!

So, it's Sunday early afternoon, i just got back from 3 awesome hours of church. As i was sitting in Sacrament meeting, i was catching up on my Book of Mormon reading (my new years resolution is to finish the book of Mormon start to finish before Riley gets back, i figured thats about 3-ish pages a day to finish with PLENTY of time!) HOWEVER, with how busy i've been, i'll be the first to admit i am FAR from perfect, i usually write Riley's letters right before bed, and THEN read my scriptures and fall asleep... but lately it's all i can do to jot down a quick letter... which last night i TOTALLY fell asleep in the middle of writing. you can actually WATCH me fall asleep in the letters, haha random pen marks, jibberish, and words that get bigger and bigger and bigger haha probably just my tired self trying to be done so i can go to sleep.

back to my original point, i was sitting and catching up on my weeks reading, cause i need to be done with page 28 by tonight, and i was only on page 19... i know i know, slacker. BUT I'M TRYING!!! so i was reading and thinking about how i turned out the way i did. i mean i come from a family of 7- Dad, Mom, Sister, me, Brother, other Brother, and other Sister... and after my Dad kind of fell away from the church, pretty much all my sibblings did too... and here i am getting up EARLY on a Sunday to do my hair because i find going to church with gross un-done hair to be disrespectful to the Lord's house... i mean seriously, i am turning into a religious nut. haha but the further down that path i go, the happier i become... and i am SOOO happy that i have a husband who feels the same way. i was thinking today, about HOW we are going to go about raising our family (when the time is right)... i have ALL these thoughts and goals about how i WANT to teach them, and things i have witnessed in other families, and i know i probably sound like a broken record... but i absolutely HATE when people give the whole "oh you won't be like that when you have kids" or "oh you will be lucky to put a bra ON when you have kids" and "you may SAY you want to feed your kids healthy, but it's just not practical when you ACTUALLY have them".... i am NOT naive, i DO understand that things will be different when i "ACTUALLY" have kids... however, you don't KNOW what i'll be like.... nobody does... i know SOOOOO many amazing families in the church  who have raised their children in the same way Riley and I hope to. i mean look at my best friend Lauren's family... i actually credit her family ALOT for helping me stay so "church-oriented) i spent HUNDREDS of weeks at her families house, and every night before dinner, after the prayer, Papa-Francis would read a chapter from the book of mormon, and they would discuss... dinner was at 6 every night, and you had to eat your salad first, THEN you could eat the main course, and if ANY of you know the AMAZING Jonell, she is the most nutrition-conscious mother in the whole world. they ate from all the food groups, but ate meat sparingly, she makes everything from scratch! her own whip cream( dairy free), sour cream, cream of chicken soup... all HEALTHY! and she would take our favorite meals from local restaurants and clone them... and then tweak it to a healthy alternative.

She also had her house SOO organized, all the kids, all 7(at the time, there are more now) knew what chores they had to do daily, as well as to practice the Harp, Piano, or whatever instrument THEY played. i mean Lauren and i TOTALLY complained at times about having to sweep the kitchen before we could head out after Acting Up, but the house ran SMOOTHLY. it was a house i LOVED to spend time in. it was in no means PERFECT, but i don't know how to explain it... OH YES I DO!!! ok so i have this wall vinyl above my sliding door in back, it reads "HOME is everything that makes us feel Beautiful and Safe and Loved" now Riley HATES that quote... as he says... and keep in mind i'm totally doing my "Riley has such a deep voice and sounds like he's better than everyone i---impression" ( love you Rye) but he says "IT MAKES NO SENSE, HOW CAN A HOUSE MAKE YOU FEEL BEAUTIFUL????? thats gaaaaaaaaaaaay" hahaha but that is the feeling her house gave...

that house was honestly my 2nd home, her parents would chat with me, even if Lauren wasn't home, and give advice. her Dad made sure to let me know that if i ever needed a blessing i shouldn't hesitate to ask. It's been years since those "good ol' days" but as i think of how i want my family to BE, thats kind of the vision i have.... it's not too extreme... i don't think... and you can feel free to tell me that it's not reasonable, or that when i actually have kids, my priorities will be completely different. but i feel as women in the church, we focus ALOT on STRIVING for that kind of household... we understand that every family is going to be different, but we also understand that with the principles of the church, it is most definitely achievable.

I may not be a Mother right now... and who knows, i may never get the opportunity to be one. But i have this mental-notebook that i keep all sorts of "parenting gems" tucked away, for the right day. and i know Riley has done the same thing, so when we do have kids (if God allows us to be parents one day) you all better watch out... the Gardiner House will be a force to be reckoned with.

oh, and i was absolutely going to leave off on that note, however i forgot to mention that starting NEXT SUNDAY, i am going to strive, to keep the sabbath day as holy as possible.. it's not like i go out swearing and drinking right now, i just feel like that is an area i need to work on.. at church our lesson was about keeping the sabbath holy, AND HOLY COW!!! all those girls seem to have it all put together, i mean they don't do laundry or dishes, and some prepare meals for the oven on saturday, so they don't really have to cook... WOW.... i am FAAR from that.... and i'm NOT starting this today, because i absolutely HAVE to get dishes done, and the floor swept.... but i'm listening to MOTAB, so that makes it all ok... right?!?!?!?!