Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Thankful Day 15- Surprise Visits

Today i am thankful for those times when you are driving home, just wanting to get in the door so you can fully break down... and you try to pull in but someone is in your parking spot.

Tonight i got home to find that Steph decided to join us for dinner, i walked in on her and Rye playing his new call of duty. soon after, Kyle showed up. I wasn't even given the chance to break down and cry, i just realized how truly blessed i really am.

It's been a hard week. i'm super busy which always makes my emotions run high. But i would also be finding out this week if we were going to have a girl or boy, it's one of those milestones that i had marked on the calendar and a countdown on my phone for.

I had a meeting tonight, and of course i was the only wife that was not either pregnant or already had kids... And as usual i felt completely ostracized because of that. People never know what to say when they learn i don't have kids after half a decade of marriage, they always assume we don't want kids, and i think that instantly makes them have harsher feelings towards me, like i don't like kids or something. So i'm on my way home, this sad song comes on the radio and i just LOSE it. i mean i have tears just streaming down my face, i'm ready to go inside and just cry on Rye's shoulder and complain about how it's not fair, and all i want is a child is that SO much to ask for....

I never got that chance. I have just spent the last 2 hours spending time with a few of our best friends here, laughing and chatting about all sorts of things. Making it impossible for me to be ungrateful. It's obviously not my time for a baby right now, So i just need to be thankful for everything i HAVE been given, and be patient for those things i want so badly.

Try not to get caught up in the situation you are in, stop. take a look around. and realized how completely blessed you are.

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