Well it happened

I LOST my military ID.... yup, after scoffing at practically every wife on base who has ever lost one (has anyone made it an entire career without losing one?) It fell out of the car the other night and it's GONE... i felt awful, and surprisingly Rye made me feel awful too. i thought he'd be like "you made it over 2 years!" nope, no such luck for this little lady. i got the whole "fantastic Sav, now my Social is just floating around on base somewhere... ugh, i'm lame and i know it.

So this morning (despite not feeling 100%) i got pretty to go take a new ID picture. We drove down to the ID office and what do ya know.. they are OUT of dependent ID's... ya i'm pissed. ugh! i went to buy Rye a drink in the mini mart on base, and since the girl knew me she let me buy it, but i ended up having to use my costco card so they could check the name on my card with my ID... ya it was embarrassing. oh well, i looked nice and pretty all day, and had a pretty sour look on my face cause there was nowhere to sit at the mall when we got lunch (seriously soooo many people) and then the gps made me turn around like 3 times to find the stupid place Riley wanted pie.. and then the PIE WAS GROSS... and then we BOTH tipped our waitress without knowing the other one did... so we left like a $6 tip for $7 worth of crappy pie... ugh, i'm just gonna stop complaining right this moment. I'm going to go babysit a few of the base's CUTEST kids, and it's going to make my night :)

If You're Happy And You Know It.

I had the most AMAZING Christmas, that seems to have extended a few days past... every year Rye and I take down the Christmas tree ON Christmas... like in the afternoon... ya it's still up. The tree is definitely dead, but i just haven't had the motivation.. maybe tomorrow morning i'll do it :)

I got absolutely everything i could ever want on Christmas, AND SOME... Rye and I are both on shortened schedules this week, so we have been able to spend alot more time together, which is nice since as we all know the work up officially starts before the new years fireworks smoke has cleared.

But for right now, i am so happy. I almost forgot what being THIS happy felt like, but I am going to enjoy it. here are a few awesome pictures from our Christmas :)

Christmas eve eve drive up to the temple

Deezul... being a Deezul

The temple wasn't decorated, but BYU was :)

Dee on Christmas morning in his Christmas pjays

Rye's Christmas Pjays

Dee freakin loved opening presents

and he got a TON of toys

This box was really difficult for him to open... he actually gave up and tried to open OUR presents

AND DONE! he passed out in this position pretty much the rest of the day.

Fog Machines and Rockband

I haven't updated my blog lately... i just feel sometimes like does anyone REALLY care whats going on in the crazy head of Miss Savannah G... usually i think the answer is no. But i started this blog not really caring if anyone read it, just to get my feelings out. so i think in that spirit... HERE'S AN UPDATE.

This is the first Christmas since 2008 we'll be spending together. 2009 he was in Bootcamp, and 2010 he was in Afghanistan... so as i told Rye it almost seems like uncharted territory, even though we've still spent 5 of them together in the past. Riley has a problem with Christmas... he spends WAAAAAAAY too much money. Thank goodness we both don't believe in having a credit card so the suffering of Christmas spending doesn't last through the entire year. Thankfully we are both finally DONE with spending this year... except we have to go shopping for Deezul tomorrow. who BY THE WAY, is now on the naughty list for destroying one of my victoria secret bra's.... seriously Deezul... did you REALLY think that was a smart move?

I was talking to Shellee (my amazing mother in law) and she had mentioned that she didn't know what to get us this year since they had both been planning on a ton of awesome baby stuff... pretty depressing when someone tells you that you screwed up your own Christmas. It just brought back the rawness of remembering what our plans for this Christmas WOULD have been. i would have been almost 6 months along by now... and i am MOSTLY over it all... i just HATE that we are getting very close to Riley leaving again, and we are still without good news. He starts his intense training again in January... so although he won't be in Afghanistan yet, i won't see him more than a few weeks until he pretty much deploys.

It's been super rainy here, WHICH I LOVE. i really love the rainy season in Hawaii. Riley can't stand it. it means we have to find more ways to stay busy INDOORS, which he is not a fan of. We've been playing a little more rockband, always a good time there :) Kyle got Rye a fog machine for Christmas, so we had a fog machine rockband night this last weekend. now all we need is the laser show and we'll be ready for our new years eve party :)

our Tree in the fog

my scentsy burner and little tree's ya... you can't really see them at all. haha

26.2

Riley took an online test once that told him that he is the 1/2 marathon type of runner... that he COULD run a marathon, but he would be hurting and the 1/2 is better suited for him. He decided to run one anyway!

Riley and Kyle found out last minute that they were going to have to work this weekend and couldn't run the race, after talking to their higher-ups they were excused to go run... i mean it IS a marathon after all!

We started our day at 12:30 (ya as in 30 min past midnight) we left the house by 1-ish to drive to waikiki and find parking... oh my goodness that was an experience all on it's own. we made our way down to the shuttle which then drove us over to the starting point. I realized quickly into the day that i am sick... i have some sort of a stomach bug, and was definitely NOT feeling too hot. fighting the urge to puke into a porta pottie is NOT fun... ugh.

We made our way to their designated start point ( the 3-4 hours group) and waited. The instructions were all given in japanese first and THEN in English, which i'm not going to lie upset me a little. I understand that 75% of the participants flew here for the event FROM Japan... however they were guests... if they held a race and 75% were americans that flew in for it.. i would still expect the primary language to be japanese. ANYWAY we were eventually able to find our way without any english signs telling us where to go.

The boys took off to a starting firework show, it was pretty legit. like 10 full minutes of fireworks... i'm a sucker for fireworks. and you can't tell me you don't love their outfits. they ran the whole thing together, how many people do you think thought they were a couple :)

After they started i was planning on heading straight to the finish to wait for 4 hours... but then i overheard that mile four would wrap right around to where i was... so i wait a little bit. i was SEARCHING for the green shorts along with the shirtless guy with a pink headband... how i missed them i'll never know (my eyesight is getting worse) LUCKILY my husband saw my pretty little face and pointed himself out... so i just barely missed it.....

if you look closely you can see Riley's eyes under Kyle's chin, staring at me like a creeper... gosh i hate that i missed them. So They passed and i started making my way to where some of the buses were SUPPOSED to be to take people to the finish... no buses... LAME... so i knew at this point i would have to walk the 3 miles back to the finish line... all the while feeling like i was about to puke. so i was standing and just playing with my camera taking some blurry shots (on purpose) wishing i had my tripod to get the effect i was wanting... when some weirdo starts talking to me. His name was Will, he's in the army and he was a creep. he told me (in the first 15 minutes of talking to him) that he has no problem going after married women as long as their men aren't deployed.... i looked at him and just said "seriously" with my most judgmental face on :) I am not the quickest person to realize when someone is hitting on me (cause it doesn't happen often) so it took me a good 10 minutes to realize that is what he was doing. When i mentioned i am married is when he brought out his charming line about married women (creep)... then he found out i was Mormon, and the rumors started flying... he was CONVINCED that i was a polygamist. the ONLY good thing that came of Will, is that an hour of me trying to get rid of him just flew by.

So with only about 2 ish hours left i joined the crowd of 10k race day walkers on their last 5k to the finish line... i tried to stay on the side since i was not registered... i honestly just needed to know how to get back to the finish. I walked down the main shopping strip of waikiki, when i nice older couple stopped me and asked me what the point of the marathon was, if it was for a foundation or what.. i informed them it was just the annual one but that their were a lot of teams running with shirts either FOR a foundation or there was a team whose shirts said "victory lap of 26.2 miles after beating cancer" he informed me his lovely wife is a cancer survivor and i told them that my nephew of only 4 years old just beat cancer as well. we chatted for a few minutes about their trip, and i learned that the younger man with them on their trip came to the island to visit my base... his brother was stationed at Kbay and was KIA earlier this year in Afghanistan. It was a conversation that i am better for having had.

I got to the finish line with nearly 3 hours on the clock. i decided it was time to find my spot at the finish line to get my classic picture of them finishing... this race was designed so if you want a picture of you finishing... you MUST buy theirs. there was no way for me to get a clear shot of the finish line. So i made the decision to walk down to right before the finish where everyone was cheering them on to finish strong, and found a place.

right before 4 hours i saw the green shorts and blue shirt.

 At the finish line then had these showers set up... Riley said it was AMAZING!

The are both in pain at this point. Riley has decided he is MUCH better at running 1/2 marathons, and that while he will do a few marathons... he's gonna mostly stick to the shorter distances... if you can call 13.1 miles short. Now we just need to get me ready for my 1/2 marathon.. i have about a year until go time!

I am SO proud of these boys. also you can SEE them getting thinner and more fit through all their races. I am SO glad i was able to brave through not feeling well and be able to be there for the guys. They are amazing, and i love being there to support them!

I am SO tired.

This weekend was the XTerra world championships for Trail Running. I kind of thought this would not be the best idea for Riley to run since he has the Honolulu marathon NEXT weekend.... but he assured me that it would be fine. So we registered him for the 21K (it was 13.6 miles which is .5 LONGER than a half marathon) through the jungles of Hawaii, I registered myself for the 5K, hoping to just beat my previous trail 5k time. Kyle signed up as well (his first trail run) as well as 2 other Marines.

We piled in the car early Sunday, and headed north on the highway, if you haven't ever been here going from our house towards the North Shore is GORGEOUS, you are on a road that is LITERALLY 10 ft from crashing waves, My car has gotten splashed by waves on more than one occasion. Up by chinaman's hat there is a ranch, Kualoa Ranch. It is HUGE and they film a ton of movies there. i have been wanting to do a tour there for a long time now, just haven't yet. We finally got there, found parking and just hung out, they had the parking just down a slight hill from the start/finish. So we were able to stay around the car until just right before, I sprawled across the trunk of our car so Riley could tape up my leg, which i have to say is the most AMAZING thing ever. Since i roll from the outside of my feet when i walk/run i get ALOT of shin and foot pain while running. it's the main reason i have hated running since middle school. but with using the KT tape (which will peel off if not secured at the top with a piece of duct tape, let me know if you know of a better sports tape for running) I have zero pain that SHOULDN'T be there.

The events from our car.

About 30 minutes prior to when the race was set to go, Team Xtreme made their entrance. If you don't know who Team XTreme is, they are a group that runs all sorts of races IN THEIR GAS MASKS.... not easy! they benefit the wounded warriors. This morning they were making one CPL's dream come true by parachuting him into the race, along with all of Team XTreme. Seeing this CPL who lost an arm and both his legs in Afghanistan last year, was absolutely moving. As the race was getting ready to start, they made their way to their place, which meant parting the crowd for his wheelchair and the group. everyone was cheering for them, there were about as many OOH-RAH'S yelled as there was clapping (including my husband, who you could tell was having a very motivated moment)

Team XTreme and Cpl Love

So the start time was delayed 20 mins... cause the cops that were supposed to direct traffic, just didn't show up. They fired the shotgun and Riley and the boys were OFF! 10 minutes later the shotgun was fired again and i was gone. I was getting passed like crazy at first... and was feeling like once again i was going to be in the VERY back of the pack... Then we reached the first hill, and not ONE other person was running, they were all walking (it was a tough hill) I slowly started passing people that had shot off like a bullet when we were on flatter ground. Then there was a downhill, and a few passed me again... next uphill i took it back! the first bead of sweat dripped off my nose at minute 8, then it was like a shower... sounds pretty gross huh! however i'm one of those girls that feels sexiest when i'm gross and sweaty, I mean whats not hot about girls who are active?! My legs were SO wobbly, i almost fell over a few times.... almost threw up a few times, EH it's part of the experience. I finally finished my 3.1 miles through the valley and tried to steady my breathing. I walked down to the car, changed into my flip flops, grabbed the camera and headed back up to the finish to wait.

gorgeous right!!!

The first of the 4 guys in our group to finish was Rye (SO proud of that boy!)

The other three trickled in within 18 minutes of Riley, one of them only 2 1/2 minutes behind.

Is that picture not fantastic. They had all just finished, were wearing their finishers medal and i told them all to look Bad-A... ya i think this one is being put onto a canvas. :) love it.

This is us with the ranch in the background. seriously such a gorgeous place!

It was an amazing event! we both had so much fun! We went to the after party later, and watched a slideshow as well as the video highlights, So i got to see the run that Riley was on... HOLY INSANE!! they were ducking under trees, and holding onto ropes as the ran down a muddle track. seriously when they post that video online, i will put a link up here, cause it looked insane.... oh and did i forget to mention that i beat my last 5k time, and Riley was in the top 100 overall for his race. He's been wanting to hit top 100 in a race for a LONG time, and this was the WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP, with about a 1000 people running his race. AMAZING.

Here we go.

Another month is coming to a close... which means a NEW one is starting... the last month we'll ever have of 2011, treasure it.

I have been in a funk all week. Like REALLY in a not so fantastic mood. I am trying really hard... and that may be my problem. I just need to let go... and trust that i will be seriously and truly happy again. I have an AMAZING husband (seriously, he is the best) and a MOST OF THE TIME awesome dog... (except this morning when i found one of my good pairs of scissors RUINED)...

As i laid in bed last night with a few tears streaming down my face i thought to myself... Is not having a baby REALLY worth crying over... to which i quickly responded with a snotty sniffle and a "uh-huh". I had a breakdown... i know, CALL THE PRESS... it happens. I'm not always this strong woman you all may think i am. I struggle... DAILY. Rye came into bed laid on his side with Dee in between us, just reached over, grabbed my hand... and simply told me "it's gonna happen babe". that's all it took... one simple touch to stop my breakdown in session.

Then i think about it... people are asking me what i want for Christmas... ALL I WANT... is two pink lines. that's it. I want to know WITHOUT a doubt!!! that before Riley leaves this country again... that i will have a piece of him. That i will forever be able to look at our child and say "WE MADE THAT!" I want him to have a bigger reason to come home. I want to give him what he so badly wants. But no one can give that to me.

I never thought after our cruise in Nov 2007 that i would be here 4 years later.. still without a kid. I'm just about to that point, where i am starting to lose hope of it happening... and i don't need people to tell me that it's going to be ok... cause what if it's not. What if we NEVER get a baby G....

UGH LISTEN TO ME, i sound like such a negative Nancy!!! ok, i'm getting off the couch, putting on my new running clothes and going for a run... i need endorphins.... NOW!!!

I'M SORRRRRRRY!!! i've been BEYOND busy!

I seriously thought every single day about what i needed to post for what i am thankful for... so rather than post 10 back posts... i will just finish these gratitude posts with what i seem to be most thankful for lately.

I'm thankful that i'm healthy. I may not be getting ready to add a little one to our family right now... but there is physically no reason why i should not be able to do that sometime soon. Actually there is no reason that i should not be doing that NOW, but that's besides the point. I'M HEALTHY.... so many others are not able to say that right now. I am beyond thankful that i am one of those that IS able to say that. oh and in case you were wondering, my nephew Jaxon... COMPLETELY done with cancer treatments. CANCER FREE! Health is something that we take for granted... and we shouldn't. Because we never know when that may be taken away from us.

I had a dr. appointment this last week, and while things not be going the way i REALLY want them too.... They are going pretty good. And someday, we'll have a little Baby G.... but for now, i'm ok with where i am.

Every month that it's just Rye Deezul and I is another month i am able to continue to work out as vigorously as i have been. Riley and I are happy and healthy... and THAT is what i am most thankful for this year.

Thankful Day 15- Surprise Visits

Today i am thankful for those times when you are driving home, just wanting to get in the door so you can fully break down... and you try to pull in but someone is in your parking spot.

Tonight i got home to find that Steph decided to join us for dinner, i walked in on her and Rye playing his new call of duty. soon after, Kyle showed up. I wasn't even given the chance to break down and cry, i just realized how truly blessed i really am.

It's been a hard week. i'm super busy which always makes my emotions run high. But i would also be finding out this week if we were going to have a girl or boy, it's one of those milestones that i had marked on the calendar and a countdown on my phone for.

I had a meeting tonight, and of course i was the only wife that was not either pregnant or already had kids... And as usual i felt completely ostracized because of that. People never know what to say when they learn i don't have kids after half a decade of marriage, they always assume we don't want kids, and i think that instantly makes them have harsher feelings towards me, like i don't like kids or something. So i'm on my way home, this sad song comes on the radio and i just LOSE it. i mean i have tears just streaming down my face, i'm ready to go inside and just cry on Rye's shoulder and complain about how it's not fair, and all i want is a child is that SO much to ask for....

I never got that chance. I have just spent the last 2 hours spending time with a few of our best friends here, laughing and chatting about all sorts of things. Making it impossible for me to be ungrateful. It's obviously not my time for a baby right now, So i just need to be thankful for everything i HAVE been given, and be patient for those things i want so badly.

Try not to get caught up in the situation you are in, stop. take a look around. and realized how completely blessed you are.

Thankful Day 14- That 1 Year has passed.

Exactly 1 year ago from the 14th, i played the waiting game. of going home for a few minutes and then getting called back.. just waiting for that one last goodbye as the buses pulled away. It is crazy that a year has passed. if does NOT feel like an entire year.

This year, Rye and I spent the afternoon grocery shopping for thanksgiving next week. We joked and made a date of it, before i left for a few extra hours of work. only to return home and find that my husband was getting sicker by the minute with this awful cold. So we made a late night trip to safeway and got him all drugged up on nyquil so he could actually get some sleep.....

And in the morning, he was right there. I cannot explain to you the joy of waking up and seeing him there. When he left for this last training, i didn't realize that i ever did this before, but i would find myself just reaching over to his side of the bed to just touch him, and he wasn't there... it was EXTREMELY depressing.

I am SO thankful that this last year is over. SOOOO thankful. I don't know if he'll be here next year on this day, so for now... i'm going to savor it.

Thankful Day 13- Phone Insurance

Every military wife LIVES with her phone attached to her. knowing at the most inconvenient time... your husband will find time in a war zone to pick up the phone and call you... and you BETTER be ready to drop EVERYTHING. I cannot tell you how many times i went into a meeting or somewhere important where i immediately apologized in advance in case my phone rang, and i just got up and ran out... it happens. The most devastating thing during a deployment is to NOT have a working phone. Thank goodness i did not have to deal with this, but MANY of the other wives did. Steph had to put a message on her voice mail a few times telling her husband to call MY number.

I firmly believe in phone insurance... when i was 17 i shattered my phone while roller skating, and my mom told me she would NOT replace it... luckily sprint was nice enough to add phone insurance and then replace it :) ever since that moment i was a believer... verizon is NOT quite so accomidating and i am SO GLAD to be back with sprint. This weekend at church my phone found it's way to the garbage can in nursery. I think a child accidentally knocked it into there... Riley is convinced it fell out of my purse and in there. WHATEVER, it's done, who cares HOW it happened. all i know is that i am SO HAPPY that i have phone insurance on my $500 phone. We quickly went into the sprint store and without ANY questions they ordered me a new phone. however i must wait until Wednesday (HOPEFULLY) to get it... so until then, i am without a phone. It is a bit difficult trying to work out our schedules with one car, and me without a phone. I am just thankful that this little mishap will not cost me anything... Things could have been MUCH worse... and for that, i am thankful they are NOT.

Thankful Day 12- Laughter

I am thankful for my ability to laugh, and laugh often. I am a very happy person, and i LOVE laughing with friends. I love all the inside jokes that only Rye and I are able to laugh at.

I love playing balderdash with my dad and siblings and laughing so hard that i have ACTUALLY peed my pants a few times....ya... i just admitted that.... eh, don't lie... you've been there. OR you're jealous!

I love laughing so hard at a joke you are in the middle of telling that you can't finish the joke because A.) you are in hysterics and B.) it's NOT that funny, and there is no reason you should be crying from laughing so hard.

I love laughing at what an idiot i can be at times... i was playing a game with a bunch of guys from Acting Up, the question was "what should a man NOT do in bed" we were all secretly writing our answers so we could guess who wrote what... me being the only married one in the group, didn't take the question to be "dirty" and wrote down "clip his toenails".................. ya, it wasn't hard to guess that was my answer....

I love trying really hard not to laugh, and trying to keep my cool when the guys are being really funny.... but knowing in my head that i need to look "cool" rather than laugh at something we all KNOW is funny. And then i just look like an idiot trying to hold in a laugh.

I am mostly thankful that i have things in my life that i am able to laugh about.... i know it won't always be like this, there will be times when there is not much funny in my life... and then there will be the good times... THESE my friends, are the good times!

Thankful Day 11- Veteren's

Veteran's day is something that is MUCH closer to me than ever before. I always knew it growing up as the small holiday that shared my youngest sister's birthday. When i heard the word veteran i would think of those older gentlemen in costco with their hats letting the rest of us know that they were in Korea or Vietnam... I did not ever imagine that i would be married to a Veteran or the Afghanistan war...

When the towers were first hit, i was in middle school. We sat in our history class for weeks and talked about the repercussions of what was happening. The Olympics were well on their way to Utah within only months, and as anyone that lived in Utah at that time knows... we were a target, and we were all a little worried. I remember Ben (the love of my short middle school life, HA) leaned over and told me that the government was going to have to restart the draft, and he was for SURE going to be drafted... and if he wasn't he would lie about his age and join in the fight.... ya... i think we all assumed it was the start of world war 3, and that our government was just as unable to find out someones age as they were in the 40's... it was a nice thing to say to a girl Ben, so you get points for that... but a very poorly thought out plan. I told him he was an idiot and they wouldn't start the draft, he then said he would wait till his 18th birthday, to which i replied that the "war" we were expecting would be LONG over by then...

Who would have known that 10 years later i would be married to a man who was brave enough to leave me for a short period of time(even though it felt like lightyears) and join in the fight.

Last veteran's day i was preparing for Riley to leave any day... others in his unit had left already. people thanked us both for his service on facebook and over the phone... and i was furious with every message, they just reminded me of the ultimate sacrifice i was PRAYING would not be made, i was trying to keep myself together so that i could enjoy what i hoped would not be our last week together. Don't get me wrong, i still appreciated everyone recognizing the choice we made to join this lifestyle.

This year is different. I have Riley back home with me. He is safe, and we were able to spend this holiday that is so dear to my heart now, together. After spending the evening before in downtown Waikiki for the ball having random strangers tell Riley happy birthday, and thanking him for his service... i assumed that would be the end of our long weekend to celebrate the USMC birthday and Veteran's day. I never imagined how many people would actually go out of their way to make a B-line for us and quickly thank Rye for all he has done. Only being able to spot him by his lack of hair :)

We decided to scale a mountain to celebrate the holiday. Koko head is hard... don't let anyone lie to you and tell you otherwise. it was GORGEOUS!!! and totally worth the work, my thighs STILL hurt, days later. As we approached our car there was a sweaty man with his arms far above his head just standing and as i stated "airing out his pits within smelling distance of the car... great..." He approached us and asked if we were heading into town, their group got locked out of their car and they needed a ride into town to get the spare. Riley i guess was feeling very kind, and said it was no problem. Rye drove an hour out of his way just so that these people would not have to call a cab and a locksmith. It's that kind of attitude that makes him the kind of man i am proud to call my husband.

Thankful Day 10- Self Confidence

I have never struggled COMPLETELY with self confidence, however i have never once thought of myself as the prettiest girl in the room. I know that i have been given talents and skills, I also know that others have similar talents and skills FAR superior to mine.

I feel you just need to find that happy medium. Where you are happy with how you are, but are never content to the point of not wanting to improve in some way. I saw a quote on pinterest that i LOVE it was something like "Too Much Ego will Kill your Talent" and it's TRUE. when you talk yourself up too much, people expect SO much more, and are more likely to be disappointed.

I am so grateful for parents that brought me up with the understanding that i am WORTH something. That i am good enough to not have to settle for anything. I have a dad who still on a regular basis will tell me how proud he is, and how beautiful he thinks i am ( i look JUST like him, so i hope he thinks i'm attractive :) ). I have a husband who never lets my head get too big... HAHA He will praise me for things i deserve praise on, and let me know when i'm being overly cocky about something i shouldn't be.

Mostly, i am just thankful that I am happy being me. I am ok with the flaws i have, and i'm ok with not being the best at everything, or anything :) I am Savannah, and i'm AWESOME. and i'm thankful for that.

Thankful Day 9- Amazing Music

It's not secret that i'm a nerd... Ya i have never ever denied that. I will sing just about anything in the shower, or while doing chores.... or while chilling on the back porch with Deezul... pretty much i just love to sing, When Rye is gone, Pandora is a constant in my house. There is NOTHING better than good music for any sort of mood.

I have a few new favorite bands/artists this year that have been good enough that i will listen to their albums on repeat for at least a few days. Including but not limited too
-Sara Barreiles -Jason Aldean - Mumford and Sons -Kings of Leon ..... Seriously the list goes on.. those are just the few stuck in my head right now.

I honestly feel that there is a soundtrack for every type of occasion, sometimes i just need to be sad, so i blast some Nora Jones "Come Away With Me" and songs that match with it, and just let it all out... OTHER times i feel the need to just BELT, so out comes my celine dion pandora list, so i can cook dinner and just SING.

Sometimes i just need to get back into the old Acting Up groove and belt some show tunes... ya, i'm one of those girls. We try to have enough Rockband parties that i am able to still feel like a star on occasion, but i still feel that something is missing and i may just have to try out for a play sometime soon..... HA we'll see how Riley feels about that.

Thankful Day 8- New Friends

Just to start this out, I want to apologize for NOT staying with this everyday, i had internet issues.... SOOOO and NOW i am without a phone for a few more days, so just bear with me... days 8-14 are coming at ya within the next few hours.

New Friends... i am SO thankful for all the new friends this life has brought us. I know i have shared this before but when Rye and I were still living in St George, he mentioned multiple times that he wished we had friends to just have a BBQ with, or a game night. and now we have SO many new friends and we are able to do the things he always wanted to.

When Riley was gone a few weeks ago, I was texted by a few of the guys who did not go to the training, making sure that i knew if i needed anything to make sure and call them. It was such a comfort knowing that if i found a centipede or rat (PLEASE NO) in my house, that i would actually have someone to call. because not knowing anyone who is able to help with that kind of stuff makes you feel more isolated on this tiny island.

Some friendships don't last too long, others last as long as they are meant to, and some last for a lifetime. No matter how long the friendship, they serve their purpose. To teach us to trust others... to teach us NOT to trust others so easily, to teach us that sometimes we NEED to humble ourselves and ask for helps, the lessons are never the same. So to those "New" friends for me, some of whom may not be friends anymore. I am thankful for you, as well as the lessons you have provided me.

Thankful Day 7- My Husband's Skills

This last week as i was driving home from the vet with Deezul, a woman side-swiped me, she was only close enough to smack my side view mirror.... I heard the noise, looked over in time to see her "OH CRAP" look on her face... and that quickly turned into a panicked "HURRY HURRY" look as she hit the gas a pulled away, turning left as i turned right so i was unable to get her plate number.

I drove back to base with my mirror dangling, The guy at the front gate (it's one of the cops that i really like, he's the nicest man every day as i drive onto base, and has slowly over the past year learned a little about me, including that i work at the ASYMCA, my dog's name is Deezul, and he even knows i'm Mormon (that last one was spilled by one of the Marines that was irritated that they pulled us over for Riley having blood shot eyes)) He asked me what the heck happened, as the other gate guards were getting ready to issue a fix it ticket to me. i explained that some woman just did a hit and run and i was furious, but my husband was due back in a few days and would fix it. So my new favorite gate guard got me off with not even a warning but just a "try and have a better rest of your day"

I had to let Riley know that Dee and I were in a hit and run, but that we were both ok, and it could have been much worse. He assured me that he would fix it as soon as possible.... so i did a super ghetto duct tape job to get me through the week, i wasn't even sure it would hold up on the freeway.... YIKES.

Riley returned LATE last night, we had to drop Deezul back off at the vet's office for another surgery, and then i headed off to preschool.... 4 hours later when i returned home.. MY MIRROR WAS FIXED!!! when i told him how impressed i was he replied with "Sav, it pays off to have this knowledge!" YES IT DOES!!! what would have been at LEAST $150 to fix was less than $10.

I am SO thankful for Riley's knowledge of cars, it is what let us be able to buy a car for $500 that is EASILY worth more than $3500, and fix EVERYTHING wrong with it for $100. it is an extremely valuable skill and one i am forever grateful for.

Thankful Day 6- Reunions

Before Riley joined the Marines, we had not spent any time of our married life away from each other, except for my 4 day trip to New Orleans, and his week long training in California for his old job. While we were dating we would have to go a week (two TOPS) without seeing each other for a few months while he was living 4 hours away. But we all know being married is COMPLETELY different than dating. so we really never spent any time away.

We were both ok with this, we are best friends and there is no one in the world i would rather spend everyday with! And i am not just saying that either. He doesn't often have "guys day" because he always ends up dragging me along on whatever adventure they have planned.

Everyone knows that i did the math and figured out that i spent 60% of our first year in the military away from each other... that is a HUGE difference to seeing each other EVERY day... What is the best part about him leaving for periods of time? ya i don't get asked that often.... or EVER for that matter. however there is a good part about him leaving... it means we get to enjoy another reunion. They are the happiest part of my life!


It keeps things fresh. But it is definitely not for everyone. It is NOT easy to be apart, and i credit my strength with the fact that we were able to solidify the foundation of our relationship before being thrown into this crazy hampster wheel. Every time he leaves, i am given the opportunity to improve myself and our surroundings so that he comes home to something better than what he left. I am able to realize how much i miss him, and how much i really do need him, but also as much as i NEED him... i'm able to do this. I CAN be alone.

The reunion though... that is something that only a military wife fully understands. When he was at bootcamp and there was absolutely no contact other than letters, he didn't feel real. It honestly felt like he was gone forever, in a totally new life. THAT is what i imagine having a missionary would be like.. but deployments, and trainings... When they leave for training, it's hard because you know that he is training to LEAVE, and that it's only __ weeks or days THIS time, but soon he'll be gone for a long time... And deployments are not fun, easy and are not cookie cutter- each one is completely different. You say goodbye, and you go home and you Pray to God every night that he is going to be ok. You rush to your phone EVERY call, because you never know if one of them may be the last. You don't argue because you don't want unkind words that you may have to live with and regret for the rest of your life.

When they return home from a deployment, it's proof that they are alive and well. even if they had called you the day before or week before to tell you they are on their way home. For us on the home front, it's not over until you spot them coming off the plane. Holding him after time away from him is the greatest feeling in the world. i have never felt as close to God as the moment i held Riley in my arms off the plane from Afghanistan, tears streaming down my face, Thanking him silently for bringing him home to me. Thanking him that i won't have to say "the last time we ever"

and THAT is what makes me ok with this military life. for those days, like today... when i get Riley home after he's been gone. Because as strong as i am... and as well as i can handle things back home... I need him more than anyone could ever know.

Thankful Day 5- Girls day

Remember remember the 5th of November! Real quickly, i am sure many are relieved that facebook was not "taken out" in honor of Guy Fawkes day... i was kinda hoping that it would... oh well.

Today I am thankful for Girls days. Steph just barely left (ya it's nearly 3 am... we party hard)..... HA. Her husband is in a training that means ALOT of homework so he spent the day with the boys studying and she spent the day with me, watching chick flicks and having a home "spa" day.

We made this face mask i saw on pinterest made with honey, nutmeg, and cinnamon. it was quite melty on our face, but i will most definitely do it again, my skin has such a nice glow, and feels so soft! After that we got out my Mary Kay Peach Satin hands and satinized our feet and then our hands, rinsed off our face mask and then did satin lips.

I then had to go try on my gown for the ball and make sure the girl that is altering it took it in enough. SHE'S AMAZING!!!!

As much drama as girls cause... and as mean as girls can be... you simply NEED to have a girls day every once in a while. it was such a fun and relaxing day. Pampering yourself occasionally is a must as well. i LOVED that we got pampered and the only thing we spent money on was honey, cause i was all out.

After renting Alladin, we started Twilight... and both CRASHED probably at 9:45 ish... Steph's husband just called for her to go grab him so they can go home. It was a good day. And this year Steph and I have had more girls days than i can count and i am thankful for every single one!

Thankful Day 4- Crystal Lite

ya ya ya... say what you will, it causes bipolar, it causes kidney stones.. yada yada yada... I LOVE IT!!!!

As a girl who has given up carbonation (special occasions don't count!) and a girl who is counting every calorie that enters my mouth hole... 5 calories for flavor is WORTH IT!!!

I keep the individual packets in my purse for those moments when the water somewhere is less than par, and i will not allow it in it's current state to meet my taste buds... i have a bad gag reflex ya know! 

I really am so thankful that this is an option for me :) it helps keep me on track and not add extra calories into my daily intake. so THANK YOU CRYSTAL LITE!!!

Thankful Day 3- My Job

Everyone knew that i was taking a break from working. I was enjoying being a stay at home wife, and being able to devote my whole day to the welfare of our family. I got a call in April from a girl in my ward at church. We were both in nursery together, but i was extremely confused as to WHY she was calling me on a wednesday. She told me that her work was looking for someone to do sibling care during preschool, and she thought i'd be perfect for it. pretty much told me that she got me an interview. I went in the next tuesday, expecting an interview, her boss showed me around and then told me that i started as soon as i got back from my trip to Utah.

and BAM just like that i had a job. It has honestly been one of the greatest blessings this year. what started out as a simple 5 hours a week, grew into my now normal 25 a week of teaching preschool. I have never worked anywhere that after 6 months, i didn't DREAD going into work. I will admit there have been a few mornings, when the house is a disaster, or the weather is horrible, or Riley has jacked the car for the day... where i think to myself what an inconvenience having a job is. HOWEVER... having an extra paycheck, and being able to do things... like pay $1000 for a surgery for our dog, outweighs ANY con.

I adore the girls i work with. We find ourselves chatting all the time about ideas, work, and families. We are all so willing to pitch in and help each other. and we have ALOT of fun everyday. There is always something going on, or some funny story.

Don't think i'm only writing this cause tomorrow is my day off and i get to go enjoy the weather (which will probably rain) I really am so grateful that God knew what i needed, even when i didn't. and he sent me the opportunity that i needed.

So now i am going to lay in bed with Deezul and listen to the pouring rain outside my window. yay for living on a tropical island it's still 76 degrees outside :) don't hate me.

Thankful Day 2- experiences

Today i am extremely grateful for all the experiences i have been able to live! especially those that may have been HARD when i was going through it, but made me a better person in the long run. I recently found a letter i wrote to myself. I wrote it when i was 17. At the time i wrote it i was bawling (you can see the tear marks on the paper) I had just gotten home from being out with Riley, and had told him i thought he should move in with his parents.

For those of you that don't know the situation, Riley and i started dating, a few weeks later his parents moved, he felt a feeling like he needed to stay. So he arranged to stay with a long time friends family. over the course of the year the family got more and more abrasive. To the point that it was borderline psychological abuse. Riley was REALLY struggling with them, but did not want to move in with his parents cause it would mean leaving me, as well as having to switch schools for the last term of his senior year.

So for his mental health, i told him to leave. With the promise that nothing would change between us. but knowing that the other times i had tried a long distance relationship... it never lasted. I knew it was the ONLY option though, because he was severely depressed in the current situation. Anyway, in this letter i talk about the situation and how i am so completely in love with him, and i don't see how we will get past this. But because i was so in love with him, that i HAD to let him go. I honestly thought that night, that we would eventually get pulled apart. Lucky for me, that boy already knew he planned on marrying me someday. and did everything in his power (including driving 4 hours each way nearly every weekend to see me) to make sure that we stuck through it all.

That is one of those experiences that forced me to Grow. To put someone else's needs above my own, even knowing at the time that i would probably gain nothing. I have always tried to be that same girl. The one that sends him off to war, promising i will keep it all together. promising that i will be ok without him, knowing full well that i am in for _ months of restless nights, and more than a few days when i just feel like something is wrong... waiting by the phone for him to call and tell me that he is alive and well.

Riley leaving for any amount of time is always an experience in which i grow.

Losing my pregnancy was another one of those self altering moments. I have had to accept that i will not get exactly what i want/pray for. I really wanted Riley to be home for my due date... however maybe i am supposed to get pregnant and have the baby while he is gone for another experience, i don't know that now...

There were a few weeks in that really Dark period i've talked about. I felt... Dark... that is the only way i can explain it. It is something that i have had to realize is actually more normal than i thought. I made a comment one day (i think the day or two before Riley said i should be medicated) that the pregnant woman in the parking lot made me furious and i just wanted to hit her... KEEP in mind i would NEVER actually harm a person. But it was that thought process of "WHY DOES SHE DESERVE THIS?!" and "What makes her more deserving than i to be a mother". that is still a question that plagues my days. When someone that i KNOW complains about everything in their life gets pregnant. i immediately think in these EXACT words "and SHE deserves a kid more than me..." I see fathers all around base that are non-existant in their children lives. who do nothing but play on the computer or constantly go out and party instead of spending time with their families... and then i look at Riley who will practically HOLD Deezul down and force him to snuggle with him cause he say's he just wants some snuggle time. And when he tells me that a music video he watched makes him want a little girl.

Or that time in the baskin robbins parking lot when he apologized for his medication comment. Letting me know that he has a hard time with me voicing my anger and hurt with the situation because he IS hurting and it IS hard for him to hear about everyone getting pregnant... When he wants to be a dad so bad. Looking into his eyes, and wanting to give him a child of his own, and yet at that moment feeling that i had just murdered his child and killed his dreams.


I thought things would NEVER get easier. and yet here i am, being able to talk about it completely rational. I can already tell that this experience will forever change me as a person. I have to take everything as an opportunity to grow and learn. and to move forward as a wife and daughter of Heavenly Father.


As i have always said to Riley "Look Unto Christ in Every Thought. Doubt Not. Fear Not."

Weight Loss Wednesday- Dress Shopping

Here we are, my second weight loss Wednesday post. How have you changed your life this week?

This last week was "ration" week, if your a military wife you know the drill. you live off whatever you have in your house until payday :) luckily my house is pretty stocked. I only had to do this because of the thousand bucks that was used for Deezul's surgery, it's not a normal occurrence in our house. I had to get creative to stay within my calories allotted for the day. And i was SO busy with halloween and all the events of that, it was difficult for me to find time to run.... those were definitely my obstacles of the week. But while everyone else was trick or treating, i hit up the commissary (our grocery store on base) i got ZERO trick or treaters... and i knew that our store on base was closed, so i drove over to pearl harbor and went to theirs. EMPTY!!!! it was amazing, that has never happened on a military payday! there were VERY few people in the store. i loved it. so now the fridge is TOTALLY stocked up on nutritional goodness. Yesterday i made applesauce in my crockpot... ya it was pretty dang good! Steph said it was almost too sweet, it was like an apple pie. She at a whole cup of it, and i think my calorie estimate was about 100 calories for it. she was pretty impressed!

I think i was only able to run once this week. it's been really crappy weather, which i LOOOOOVE, but my bodybugg doesn't like rain, AND i'm a bit of a klutz, so i can just imagine me eating pavement, as a platoon of Riley and my friends run by... NO thank you. I did hit my calorie burn goal everyday (maybe missed it once, but i was close)

I went dress shopping for the ball yesterday. Steph and I went and fell in love with the EXACT same dress. and BOTH wanted to buy it... she won :) i had to find another one. so i am happy with the dress i got. we'll see if i LOVE it the night of the ball. This year there will  be MANY more pictures, since i didn't bring a camera last year. trying on dresses was fun though. probably cause i have had better self esteem since taking this all serious again. Riley is going to get home to a changed woman.... and a changed menu, HAHA. yesterday made me hopeful about future clothes shopping trips. lately clothes shopping is the LAST thing i want to do... cause i don't want to be depressed about it... so instead i'm changing myself so that i am nothing but excited about new clothes :)

Alright so here are my stats 
Since last weeks post i am down 3.2lbs
Since 12 days ago when i started i am now down 7.2lbs
HECK YAAAAA!!!!!

I feel fantastic! keep in mind i'm still eating! and normal food too! i had 2 fun size chocolate candies on halloween, plus 2 suckers. last week one day a mom from preschool brought cupcakes (which by the way, one cupcake is 160 calories.... ya thats half my snack allowance for the day!) it's all about making room in your daily plan for a treat. i had to work that cupcake INTO my 1200 calories. I went to 2 BIG Halloween events, plus Halloween and i am still DOWN 3.2 lbs this week. i am EXTREMELY pleased with that. My original goal was to be down 15 lbs by the ball which is a week from tomorrow, i don't think i will get there. HOWEVER i am not going to be upset about that. I am happy with my progress.

also real quickly this is the BEST method i have found to have a healthy breakfast! Chop up all your different veggies and have them in containers so on mornings when you don't have tons of time, you just have to grabe a small handful of each, and toss them into your egg scramble (2 egg whites and 1 full egg) i add 1/4 cup cottage cheese as well and it's usually about 250 calories! and that includes my little bit of fruit on the side! here is how i do it!

on the left we have red peppers and green peppers, on the right are my tomatoes and green onions. and in the middle is the corn i sliced off the cob (i'm in the middle of doing that right now actually, so that container isn't full yet. keep these in your fridge or freezer and then you are able to toss them in!

Thankful Day 1- Vacuum's

I originally wrote this last night, just forgot to post it, so i apologize.

I LOVE Thanksgiving, it's a time to reflect on ALL you've been given and all that you have in your life. So i am going to do the 30 days of gratitude posts. some may seem more serious than others, but i assure you, these are ALL things that i have realized more this year how much i really need them in my life.

Day 1- Vacuum's.

When i first got to the island everyone knows it took a year to get all our crap out here.... so i had to just live simply. This meant SWEEPING my floors. i don't think the military believes in carpets (probably because of how poorly military familys take care of their houses as it is.) This means my ENTIRE apt is hard floors, that is ALOT of sweeping. and i HATE sweeping. the floors ALWAYS feel gross even if i swept earlier that day, it was IMPOSSIBLE to clean the house all at once.

When our stuff arrived one of the items i was MOST excited about was my Dyson ball. it's an AMAZING vacuum, and it was one of the first things i used. i can now quickly run the vacuum over the floors (nearly daily) because Deezul feels the need to coat the floor with his hair, it's a never ending battle. But having my vacuum back gives me a bit of an advantage.

I Never Am Able to Find the Words

When i meet wives on base the first question is ALWAYS the same "Do you have any kids"

We had an event at my work tonight, it was SUCH a success, and so much fun meeting so many new parents in the area. I think i must have been asked if i have any kids AT LEAST 15 times. and after smiling and responding "nope not yet" all of them said something about how i should really wait, or good for you, something along those lines. i never know what i should say, because i REALLY hate when people respond the way they do. I've always hated it. like you just met me, and yet you have an opinion on whether or not i am ready for children. So if you are one that responds in that way to people, just keep in mind that it might not be the best response. i had a girl tell me, the weekend i was actually miscarrying, that children were such a burden and it was such a good thing i didn't have any yet... not knowing that the baby i was hoping to have had died and that i was in the middle of an extremely painful miscarriage. How could she have known, i wanted to keep that as private as i could at the time. I am realizing now that i don't WANT to have to keep this to myself, i don't want or need pity... i just hated that i felt like i was completely alone, and then when people found out what had happened, SO many people came forward saying they went through a similar thing... WHY ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS?!?! it should NOT be taboo. I found out recently that a wife (who i have known for a long time) has been telling people (alot of people) that i am unable to have children. I found out about this and was HURT. i found out because someone mentioned my name and this person (WHO DOESN'T EVEN KNOW ME) was like "oh ya, that's the girl that can't have kids."

I was more hurt and upset than i thought i would be. This is NOT who i want to be known as, ESPECIALLY since it is not true. i was venting to Riley about this, and as always i was proved how lucky i am to have him, he knows how to deal with me he quickly responded "then i guess she will look like a retard when we have a kid huh!"

I was really close with 2 girls when i was working in st george, one got married only a few weeks after we did, and the other followed by only a few months, we were all the same age within weeks of each other. we just clicked and became this trio at work. the first girl and her husband decided shortly after they got married that they wanted to expand their family. the second wanted to wait YEARS for kids.#1 had been trying for about 6 months when #2 was surprised  with morning sickness, she felt AWFUL that the other had been trying so hard and NOTHING. they were finally able to conceive after i think 18 months. It was painful to watch her go through, when she finally got pregnant the dr. told her it was not a pregnancy and was actually cancer. THANK GOODNESS he was proved wrong after a few days, and they gave birth to a healthy baby boy. But when i first called Riley to tell him what the dr said to her, he told me his stomach dropped and he felt sick to his stomach. i remember when she had her first miscarriage they had to do a D&C, our work wouldn't give her more than one day off... and she came to work depressed for a VERY long time. i never fully grasped what she was going through. i remember multiple times she would just break down and bawl while i just held her and told her it was all going to be ok. I went home night after night EXHAUSTED telling Riley how unfair it was that they wanted a child SO BAD and would be amazing parents and yet crackheads were getting knocked up by the minute. I would lay in bed and talk about how bad i felt for her, and say something along the lines of "that won't be us" in a hopeful way.

Here we are 4 years after deciding we were ready, with no luck and a few losses on our side. We kept all of this a total secret from nearly everyone, not even our parents knew we were trying. it's been 4 years of everyone including our parents telling us that we are still babies and aren't ready to have kids. Not knowing how many times i have cried over having to go to the story for "girly supplies".

I finally feel like i have been able to for the most part put our recent loss behind me. I was pretty bad for a while there. I'm not normally a depressing person, but we had a couple dark weeks. I started crying in the theater when i watched the preview for "The odd life of Timothy Green" at the beginning the dr tells them they cant have kids and i just LOST it. I'm a firm believer of treating depression with exercise. Riley made the mistake only ONCE of telling me that whatever i was trying wasn't working and i should get on some drugs... i think after the death glare he realized he had made a BIG mistake. Rye has never had to deal with me having a COMPLETE meltdown, it was a totally new thing and he was almost in a panic to try and figure out how to deal with me when i wasn't being the easiest wife in the world. I still have rough days, i'm sure i always will or at least for a good long while. But most days i am able to look on the bright side. It's still hard to realize that this next week i would find out what we would have had. Or to see the girl at church that has a due date the day after mine would have been.

I am extremely blessed, i have the most wonderful husband in the world. Not a day goes by that i don't thank God for him. He's my very best friend, i enjoy nothing more than being with him. And i have the worlds greatest dog. sure he can be a butthead, but he is SO well behaved and the biggest mama's boy i the world, he's my baby boy, and will always be my "first kid".

So for tonight i am TOTALLY fine, just sick of people having opinions as to whether my husband and I should be allowed or ready to procreate. We always intended on being young parents. Riley's rule was that he did not want to be a dad before he turned 21...... he will be AT LEAST 25.... things don't always work out the way we plan for them to.

So i am now an open book on the subject of what happened, i am not afraid to talk about it, and no one should be afraid i might break down into tears at any moment. I'm back to normal Sav, I never realized how level headed i normally am, until i felt like i was losing it. it's a scary thing to feel like you are going crazy and are not in control. Let's not do that again :)

Tatoos On This Town

Goooooood Morning faithful blog stalkers!!! i'm trying to keep myself busy until 9am when i am allowed to eat breakfast (i'm trying something). So i had that headache until this morning, i woke up a few times in the night with it... i was in so much pain i went to bed at 7pm, Rye called and woke me up at 8 just to catch up on my day, and then let me go back to sleep. i slept until 6 this morning... WOWZA, i was tired!!! So first thing i went and took Deezul outside, which was when i caught a glimpse of the sunrise this morning, Holy Moly it was amazing.... So i hurried and threw on my running clothes and went for a quick Run. it was gorgeous!

So i get home, hurry and shower and then throw on some awesomely motto sweats... yup the green boot camp ones. they are my favorites! Then Kat texts me and tells me to check out the video for "Tattoos On This Town" by Jason Aldean, now i LOVE that song so i hurry and click over to youtube....



Seriously i BAWLED! haha ok, blame it on hormones... you'll probably tear up too though.

What's With the Headache

So i have decided with this time alone this time i am going to (when i'm not working) chill out with a one tree hill marathon... ya, it was just added on netflix.

I spent a few extra hours at work today helping decorate for Halloween. About an hour before i left this headache hit me with a force like a rocket. i don't get headaches often, but 2 hours later, this is definitely proving to be the worst i've ever had... LAME!!!! i just cannot wait for the sun to set so i can go to sleep, cause this does not feel nice!!!

Tomorrow is normally my day off (one of the many) but i will be spending the day at work for an awesome event that i am excited for :)

I know this is a quick post. But at this second i don't have too much on my mind.




The End :)

Weight Loss Wednesday! - No Boring Breakfast Here

Alright so i promise not to make this blog all about weight loss, or fitness or anything like that... So i have given myself a rule, i am ONLY allowed to post anything like that related(except for races and such) on Wednesdays, so welcome to the first ever weight loss Wednesday. After i posted about that girl (you know, the one that is TINY now) i decided it WAS the perfect motivation. I started tracking what i am putting in my mouth, which for me has always been the one thing i WON'T do. I put an App on my phone so that i can track anytime anywhere, and can simply look up the foods on the app rather than have to look up online how many calories something has. According to the App i should be taking in 1240 cal per day (it went down to 1220 after i entered my new weight yesterday). tracking my food has made a WORLD of difference. I am having to watch everything! i bought these new pumpkin spice almonds (AMAZING!!!!!)

i bought this whole container on base for only $5, YA, go grab some NOW!!! anyway, they are amazing, but i am only allowed 22 nuts at a time... and that's 160 cal just for some almonds. now some would argue, almonds are good for you, YES they are. however too much of a good thing isn't always good for you. counting out my almonds, and putting them in a baggie was slightly depressing the first time, because Riley and Kyle were just snacking on them in the car, asking if i wanted any... and i couldn't.. it was a sad day.

I am also a firm believer that when you eat the same thing day after day, it's NOT going to end well... so i have been mixing it all up big time! here are my last three breakfast's

 This scramble has 2 egg whites and 1 full egg, some sliced up tomatoes, green peppers, corn stripped from the cob, red peppers, 1 slice of turkey lunch meat, cottage cheese, salsa and black pepper that plus my 1/2 of the orange i cut up totaled 260 calories, and you can see the edge of my drink, i've been drinking the strawberry crystal lite (always been my favorite)

 I have always HATED greek yogurt, it's too tart and just UGH... but i knew that to get serious about this i would have to start eating it... so i tried the yoplait honey vanilla, pretty dang good. So this is the 100cal yogurt cup, with 3 frozen strawberries sliced up (it was too many strawberries in my opinion... it was like yogurt coated strawberries rather than yogurt with berries) and then an 1/8 cup of rolled oats sprinkled on top. this totaled 191 calories, looking back on yesterday i would have added something else, cause i got hungry a little sooner after this than i was expecting. i think 250 calories is good to hover around for breakfast. Too low and you get hungry soon after

check this out... ya it looks amazing... this was my breakfast about an hour ago. it's 1 cup vanilla soymilk, 5 frozen strawberries, half a frozen banana and 1/4 cup of oats. This is 282 calories. and worth every single one! i actually made this same smoothie without the oats for dessert last night. it's such a simple recipe but it tastes like we bought it. I made one for one of the Marines and he thought it was amazing. so this recipe is a for sure winner!
you cannot tell me that a doughnut looks better than these meals.

Riley and i eat healthy 75% of the time normally, however i never measured my almonds or cottage cheese... and so i was taking in too many calories to lose any weight. Even with all the working out! With simply tracking what goes IN my body and paying close attention to my bodybugg to track how many i am burning... i have lost over 4 lbs... since Saturday. My skin is clearer, i have a glow! and i feel better. Yesterday i got home after work and was BORED cause Riley is gone, and i ended up eating a brownie someone had brought us... when i tracked it... it was 150 calories... for a tiny brownie. i won't tell you it wasn't good... cause it was. but not worth having to adjust my day around! i would rather have a chocolate pudding with whip cream for 70 calories.

My goal is to be down by 10 lbs by the time Riley returns. I am confident i will shatter that goal :) stay tuned for next Wednesday to see how i'm coming along!

Beaming with Pride (Rye's 30k)

I swear this is our story almost every weekend now... Riley ran a race. and is awesome. haha so i am SORRY if you do not share my enthusiasm or interest. Riley and Kyle had their 30k yesterday, ya that is 18.somethin miles. they have been doing the marathon readiness series to get them ready for the Honolulu marathon, and this 30k was actually the last 18.somethin miles on that course.

Here is my recount of the day! Gun time was at 5, so we had to arrive at 4(a little later if we were running late but i wanted to shoot for 4 to make sure they both had time). Since the race was in Waikiki (we live on the other side of the island) we had to leave BASE by 3:30, which meant Riley and i had to leave to pick kyle up by 3:20, thus our alarms for the day were set from 2:20-2:40. We stayed up late the night before watching storage wars on netflix(i blame Rye for that).

I told them both i would drive so they could prepare themselves. Truth is, Rye is horrible when it comes to dealing with traffic and big cities, so it was for my own benefit. Alright so we get there and find out there are 1300 runners, HOLY CRAP!!! Riley was still hurting from the trail run him and i did last week, so we had our doubts as to whether he should do this race or not. He told me prior to the race starting that he was just going to take it easy, and not "worry" about trying to place.

Gun time at 5:00AM (still pitch black outside) i hurried and put my camera on auto just to get a few shots of them coming around the first bend

they are in the middle of the picture towards the back, Harpster in his black shirt, Rye in his red.

I settled in for a LONG morning, knowing that i probably would not see the boys for at least 2 1/2 hours. haha ya that was my goal for them. i sat on a bench in the park listening to my audio book for the first hour. I kept hearing this REALLY weird noise, it sounded like freakin monkeys. So i took out my headphones and was trying to figure out what kind of animal was screaming like a monkey. it seriously took me 5 minutes to realize that i was only 150 ft from the honolulu zoo, and i was ACTUALLY listening to monkeys screaming (must have been feeding time.... or monkey fight club). After an hour of hoping that a hobo wasn't going to shank me for stealing his bench (if you've ever been to Honolulu you have experienced the homeless here) i thought i would get up and go for a walk, since i had at least another hour to kill. i crossed the street to waikiki beach and decided to take some pictures of the city with the sunrise, i got a bunch that i love alot, but i think this will be the one i will get printed onto a canvas.

Soon i figured i should head back to the finish line, the time clock was approaching 1:50:00. by 1:57 we had our winner CRAZY FAST, HOLY CRAP!!! I found my place at the finish line to make sure i could get some good pictures of the boys, and started counting finishers so i knew when to expect them... i don't know why i do this, i ALWAYS lose count and forget what i'm doing, and then i see all these finishers and i get worried that Rye didn't do as well as he hoped and then i would have to deal with that disappointment.

The clock hit 2:30:00, and i started getting a little worried. did he get injured? is he limping to the finish line, did he decide to stop at mcdonalds on the race course? WHERE was he?!!? 1 minute later he was in my sights!

haha you probably cannot see him, if i zoom this in all the way i can see the figure in the red shirt... what can i say, i KNOW my husband. i would know him anywhere.

He always looks so calm and focused when he runs... i look like a cat in heat when i run.

He headed straight for the water and snacks, while i stood my ground hunting for Kyle. Soon i saw some maniac running for the finish, MORE like sprinting.

less than 5 minutes after my goal for them, and they are both across that finish line. AMAZING!!!! i don't care how they placed (i never do) i am just so absolutely proud of them both!!! oh and ladies, Kyle is single! so if you are interested, i can put in a good word for ya (seriously)

 Kyle grabbing some water

 he's wiping off sweat, NOT smelling himself... haha i think

 stretching it out

 they may look a little irritated, but they really love that i get all these pictures.

 i don't know if you can read that... but Rye place #120 OVERALL, and 2nd in the male 20-24 division... AMAZING!!! and Kyle is #129 OVERALL and 3rd in the male 20-24 division... INSANE! i was so proud of them both, they have both worked really hard, so to be able to both place was the best thing that could have happened

 names were called, getting their awards.

 i told them to smile with their plaques... where are the plaques? and who the heck is Riley creepily staring at???

Ya..... these are definitely the boys.... giving me a "professional" pose with their awards... nerds :)